User:Cebeck/Magmatic water/Mrothroc Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Cebeck


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Cebeck/Magmatic water
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Magmatic water

Introduction
I like that you added what magma is as an introduction to magmatic water- because tbh I had no idea what magmatic water was before I clicked on your sandbox and had you not introduced it that way I probably would have been lost. Wording in the third sentence is weird *surrounding these hydrothermal fluids*- didn't understand if they are surrounding the hydrothermal fluids or if they're in equilibrium with them etc. I think you should keep the piece from the original version of the article saying that magmatic water is released during volcanic eruption because I was confused on the source of it- I know almost nothing about earth science lol. I do like the concluding sentence of the paragraph- shows an implication.

Composition
I like that you added this section- I think it added the significance of magmatic water and provided further background which was very helpful. I also appreciated the image that you added- I think it was a nice addition. One note I will make is the use of (I'm assuming) the acronym VOC's and I don't see that ever defined so I personally am still a little lost with what a VOC is. In the minerology section- is the IR study data relevant? I'm genuinely not sure if this is important or if it is extra info. Overall, in this section I like that you included different kinds of magma, where they are found, and how the differ. Think this is a great addition.

Water In Silicate Metals
I like that you added the intro sentence in this section to orient readers on why the silicate metals are important- didn't get this from the current version. Not sure what you mean by the inherent soluble is low- maybe meant to put inherent solubility? I like that you included the significance of the solubility as being related to how explosive a volcano is. Feel like this emphasized overall importance of knowing solubility.

Stable Isotope Data
In this section I like that you offered a conclusion that from the isotope data you can know that magmatic and meteoric water are in circulation. Also not sure if this would be relevant to include in the wiki article but maybe what stable isotope data is in general or what it can tell us in general? Not sure if that would be out of scope of the article.

Overall
overall I think you did a good job of adding important info to the article. Again, I don't have a strong understanding of earth science so some of my comments stem solely from me not understanding precisely the impact of certain findings so I'm not sure if some of my comments to add info would be out of the scope of the wiki article etc. There were a few grammar clarifications that I mentioned as just general edits. I thought the edits to the composition heading were best at really helping to deepen my understanding of magmatic water, and also the image helped a lot also!