User:Charlotteo14/Dr. Hanes Walton, Jr./Theoneandonlyjacobisaacs Peer Review

The lead has been updated to reflect the new content well. The lead includes an introductory sentence that clearly describes the article's topic. The content added feels relevant and clear to the purpose. The added information is informative of Dr. Walton's early life. The lack of relevant information regarding his early life prior to your additions showcases an important gap that you have helped fill. I think it is important how you decided to add information about how he was the first person to graduate with a PhD in government from Howard University.

Farther down into your peer review, you worked on how there are important contributions to journals that he made. I think this is an important distinction that you added to the type of work he did. It is important to notice how we worked on different journals with different focuses.

You also added selected publications that he contributed to. That is an important part of the page that you have added credibility to by adding examples of all of the publications he made.

I think the tone of your additions are impressive in their neutrality. I think there could be some work on tonal balance in the examinations of the publications he worked on. The writing in that part could be seen as partisan in some ways and should be focused on. The last sentence of that section could be a little less vague as well which could benefit from more specificity. I do think overall you did a great job of managing to make sure that you are completely neutral in your additions to this page.

I also believe your bibliography page is well organized and contains relevant information. The bibliography is especially well done as it focuses on the importance of reputable journals and peer-reviewed processes.

Additionally, all of your sources work well and are from reputable places which adds to the credibility and focus of your content additions.

General info
charlotte014
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Charlotteo14/Dr. Hanes Walton, Jr.
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Hanes Walton Jr.

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)