User:ChloejWard/Hornblende/Ol Evene Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

ChloejWard


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Editing User:ChloejWard/Hornblende - Wikipedia


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Hornblende - Wikipedia

Evaluate the drafted changes
Clarity

The draft changes are well organized. Good use of headers allowed for clarity when navigating the article, and the headers used are consistent with the original article. The content is fairly well-written and concise (don't forget to add a period to the sentence in "Uses of Hornblende"). This allows for good reading comprehension. Minor adjustments could be made in the intro paragraph to correct for grammar : "...to refer to a dark coloured amphiboles" --> "...to refer to dark coloured amphiboles" (for example) would make the sentence more clear. Additionally, links to other related Wikipedia pages could improve clarity and comprehension for some readers. For example, links to Granite - Wikipedia, Syenite - Wikipedia, etc... In the section "Uses of Hornblende" consider mentioning Bowen's reaction series - Wikipedia to help explain hornblendes approximate crystallization depth/temperature. Further explanation, if possible, could help readers make links to external concepts and contribute to their own understanding. Lastly, in the "Article body" section, it is mentioned that "amphibolites are rocks which consist mainly of amphibole minerals, most abundantly hornblende...". Consider making it clear that hornblende is a general/field term that includes many different amphibole minerals (tremolite, glaucophane, edenite, etc). Further, adding a list of hornblende minerals to the article could be beneficial. This could form a new section or be added to the "Compositional variances" section in the main article.

Overall, the article is clear and concise allowing for clarity and understanding.

Structure

The article makes good use of headers to create structure. These headers are relevant and align with the main article. In doing so, the article is easy to navigate. There is a good balance between developed paragraphs and listing physical properties. The paragraphs provide concise information, and the list of physical properties was a good choice to structure this section ("Physical Properties"). The list made it easy to obtain the key physical properties of hornblende. Excellent use of headings to divide the article into important information and to create a balanced structure.

Ensure that headings all follow the same format (i.e., capitalization). The main article capitalizes the first word of the header title, but not the following word. For example, if the main article: " P hysical p roperties", and " C ompositional v ariances". This is minor, however, it is important for formatting purposes to stick to one format.

Balanced Coverage

The sandbox draft does a good job of balancing information. This is expressed through the addition of fundamental concepts such as the physical properties, and by adding a section on the uses of hornblende. Additionally, the content that was added is neutral, and simply presents factual information relating to the topic. All sections are well-balanced and provide sufficient detail to get the point across. There is, however, room to add additional detail if possible. Consider looking at well-developed mineral articles such as Quartz - Wikipedia for some ideas. A possible idea could be to add how hornblende is sometimes used in construction (highway construction, "black granite" for countertops, floor tiles, etc) (see: Hornblende | Physical - Optical Properties, Occurrence, Uses (geologyscience.com)).

Neutrality:

The content is neutral and does not appear to favor any information. The article does a good job of adding information and facts. As mentioned above, the addition of fundamental concepts and "lesser know" information about hornblende like its uses provides a good overall view of the topic.

Sources

It appears there are no citations or references added, however, it is clear that information has been gathered from sources. Ensure that citations are added and referenced. Additionally, adding links to other Wikipedia pages where nescceasry could be beneficial to the overall comprehension. Adding sources and making links will help individuals seek out information.

Suggestions for Improvement

Overall there is clear effort in adding information. This information is relevant, and adds to the body of knowledge on hornblende. Most sentences are clear, well-organized/structured, and balanced. A main suggestion is to include all references and associated citations. Check over work for grammatical errors (adding a period), and ensure formatting is followed for all headers.

Ol Evene