User:ChrisBranch1999/Frank Silas Doernbecher House/StaceySmithOSU Peer Review


 * Prof. Smith's comments on the first draft of the Wikipedia article

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hi Chris,

I'm putting my feedback for the Wikipedia article first draft here.

Lead:

- Put some sort of qualifier in from of "house." What kind of house? At the very least, say historic. If possible, name the type of architecture it represents or mention something about its historical or architectural significance. For instance, start with something like: "is a Tudor-Rival mansion"

Content:

- Do we know the name of Doernbecher's mother as well?

- What town in Wisconsin did Doernbecher live in while he learned to make furniture? Was there anything distinctive about the kind of furniture, such as the style or type of German craft production his family used?

- Can you explain what these different clubs were and some of the things he did as a member of them?

- The part about his reputation as one of the most important men in the Columbia River Valley sounds like it is from a source that was not neutral on him, but meant to praise him. Can you give specific examples of awards or accolades he won? If not, I would cut out this part.

- Why was the house put on the register? Does the petition give a reason? Was it architectural significance or Doernbecher's historic significance?

Style:

-Comma after 1861 in the first sentence.

- Capitalize Willamette River

- "entrenched" rather than "engrained" (or maybe you mean ingrained? engrained isn't a word).

- I would use "after his death" rather than "postmortem," which means an autopsy.

- Spell out Oregon Health and Science University rather than abbreviating it.

- Just use "rectangular," rather than "in nature."

- What is the house used for now? Is it still a private residence?

- Do we know anything about the history of the house itself after his death? Has it always been a private residence? Was the sale of the house part of the donation money for the hospital?

References:

These look good.