User:Cjizzles

Life
Christopher M. Giles was born on August 11, 1982 in Newark, Ohio. He was born with a stomach disorder known as Achalasia and spent the first year and a half of his life in Children's Hospital in Columbus, Ohio. He had a surgery called Nissen fundoplication that saved his life. He died in his mother's arms at around 7 months of age and was revived. The surgery was done as a semi-emergency procedure, without it he would not live much longer due to not being able to keep food down. After the surgery he was able to eat by way of a feeding tube known as a G-Tube, or Gastric feeding tube. To this day, he has an eleven inch scar going from his xyphoid process to his belly button and a button hole scar looking like a second belly button where the G-Tube entered his stomach.

Chris is the self proclaimed "second most awesome person you will ever meet!" Simply because claiming to be "the most awesome person you will ever meet!" is only something a pretentious a-hole would do.

Chris has held the nicknames "Jizzles" and "Captain Boobies!". Jizzles came from the time when Snoop Dogg was using "izzle" at the end of all of his words, "fo shizzle!" Captain Boobies came from the fact that Chris + Guinness + Women = Boobies. If Chris and Guinness were mixed at a party where there were women, it was like Mardi Gras, sans beads. However, this is no longer the case. After obtaining his cape (red velvet), which is the staple symbol of Super Heroism, Captain Boobies was laid to rest.

Catch Phrases
"Giggity"

"Heh, heh...allriiight!"

"Niiice"

"Epic!"

"Oh my god! That's so soft!"

"What a tool-bag!"

"Douche-baggery"

Favorite Things (aka "Things that don't suck!")
Cartoon character - Glen Quagmire

Fragrance - Vanilla

Color - Blue or Neon Green

Body part - Boobies! :)

Beverage - Mountain Dew (Original, Baja Blast and Voltage)

Alcoholic beverage - Guinness