User:Cjlewis1204/Eastern hognose snake/Pitandpendulum Peer Review

General info
Cjlewis1204
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Cjlewis1204/Eastern hognose snake:
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Eastern hognose snake

Evaluate the drafted changes
Overall, all your information looks really good, you've added considerable depth to the article, and your sources all look good! Broadly, I would look over your work for grammatical edits--using more commas to break up sentences, making sure you haven't missed words, etc. More specifically, I would suggest seeing if you can break up the section on predators--you have one sentence about natural predators, and the rest of the section is about the human impact on the snakes. I would simply make the human impact it's own section, for clarity. Your sentence "H. platirhinos is a very mildly venomous species that's effects aren't deadly" reads somewhat oddly, I would see if there's a way you can revise it to make it read more smoothly.

Other small sentences I would look over:

- "length, taking up to 21 months to achieve." Achieve what?

- " that other affects humans have" should be effects

- "drops 19 degrees" should be drops below

- "and has the identifiable upturned "snout"" should be 'and have'