User:Clairer.svg/Hair in African Sculpture/Lumiious Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Hair in African Sculpture


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Clairer.svg/Hair_in_African_Sculpture?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template

Evaluate the drafted changes
"Hair styles in African cultures like the Dan peoples or the Yoruba, carry meaning and significance..." -> provide a link or citation to the Dan/Yoruba people for reference

"In this article, ‘hair’ is referring to human hair." -> I don't think the 'in this article' is necessary. Just stating human hair will be enough information

"protruding features or indentations that resemble common hair styles." -> perhaps have examples of the hairstyles for reference

"In older African societies, hair is often a part of rituals, and so it is often paired with power figurines." -> take out second comma after rituals

Hair is a very interesting medium for sculptural practices and I have honestly never thought about it being used in African practices before! I think this is a very engaging topic. I just had some simple general edits but I do know there is more to come so please feel free to take them with a grain of salt! I am looking forward to seeing more information added and how the finished article turns out.