User:Conceptcontext/Choi Seung-hee/KoreanArtHistory.. Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Conceptcontext


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Conceptcontext/Choi_Seung-hee?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Choi Seung-hee

Evaluate the drafted changes
What does this article do well:

Very detailed in showing how she was such a special dancer and how her performance and her name was a representation of multiple national events at the time. Sources seems legit too (assuming only 2 and 7 are your contributions and sources). Given this was a pretty developed article that already exist in Wikipedia, I think your contributions was very important in terms of consolidating her specific contributions to culture and the dance community.

Any turn of phrases that describe the subject in a clear way:

N/A

Changes I would suggest:

I noticed a few different versions of her name in the article, it might be confusing for readers who aren't familiar to Korean names so maybe include a clarification of potential different spellings. Check for spelling errors. If you can, link any names mentioned in the article (if wikipedia already has a page on that), for example, link "Giovanni Vittorio Rossi". I also think structure needs a bit improvement because Biography seemed very long.

Most important thing I think the Author should improve:

Spelling and name variations (as mentioned above).

Did I notice anything about the article you reviewed that could be applicable to my own article:

I think this article used really good and clear in text citation that I should perhaps borrow.