User:Coping-mechanism


 * I have an unopenable bottle of apple juice. It's simply a marvel of modern science and that's all there is to it.
 * I like music a lot, and my tastes are somewhat varied. My music collection draws "oohs" and "aahs" from whoever I'm willing to allow into my room.
 * I do a lot of stuff, some of which I'm okay at, some of which I'm not-so-okay at. BUT ONE DAY
 * I come from a town called Maryborough, but don't hold that against me. Just because I was born and raised there doesn't make me a Maryborough person.
 * I'm tuned to the left of the dial, politically speaking. I vote Greens. They may be ridiculous but at least they aren't fucking evil.
 * My group of friends is the greatest group of friends ever. Or, at least, the greatest group of friends I've encountered thus far. Think you can prove me wrong?
 * I hate television, but there are a number of television programs I like. Unfortunately they are usually cancelled, long dead, or only shown late at night on obscure channels. The television glitterati hate me, so I hate television. It works out best that way.
 * I'm hooked on V. It is the greatest energy drink ever. It shits over all other caffeinated beverages, most of which I hate.
 * I may be paranoid, but my inbuilt bullshit detector is second-to-none. Just because you think you've gotten away with something doesn't mean you have.
 * That unopenable bottle of apple juice is annoying me. I FUCKING WANT JUICE GODDAMNIT
 * I was once known as User:Jesustrashcan but some overzealous Wikifuck put an end to that. Apparently I merely had the potential to be offensive and thus, that was grounds for my dismissal. Well, if I gave two shits about Wikipedia accounts, I'd probably be a little more annoyed.
 * I only made this page out of spite. Yo.

Crap I've Done

 * My shoddy webcomics
 * My non-comic DeviantArt page
 * A blog I write for when I can be bothered

Music
The Adverts, Ausgang, Syd Barrett, Captain Beefheart, The Birthday Party, Black Flag, David Bowie, Buzzcocks, Casiotone For The Painfully Alone, Alice Cooper, Cop Shoot Cop, The Cramps, Crass, The Cure, The Damned, Danzig, Dead Kennedys, Death From Above 1979, The Doors, The Dresden Dolls, Einstürzende Neubauten, Brian Eno, The Fall, Foetus, The Jesus and Mary Chain, Joy Division, Killing Joke, Liars, Lydia Lunch, Misfits, The Mothers Of Invention, Nine Inch Nails, Pere Ubu, Pink Floyd, Pixies, Plasmatics, Public Image Ltd., Ramones, The Residents, Siouxsie And The Banshees, Sonic Youth, Patti Smith, The Stooges, Swans, Talking Heads, Talkshow Boy, The Velvet Underground, Violent Femmes, Wire, Yeah Yeah Yeahs

The Best People Ever
Lo and behold, my list of people who are far better than you, for multiple reasons.


 * Thurston Moore (only the greatest guitarist to ever live)
 * Amanda Palmer (most prettiest ladything around today)
 * Crispin Glover (this does not need further explanation)
 * Christopher Morris (nobody does comedy like he does)
 * J.G. Thirlwell
 * William S. Burroughs (junkie pederast who came up with the term "heavy metal" and wrote the greatest novel ever written)
 * Kurt Vonnegut (everything was beautiful, and nothing hurt)
 * Derek Jarman
 * David Lynch ("Mommy... baby wants to FUCK!")
 * Todd Solondz
 * Daniel Clowes

People I Know
Here's a list of the other Wikipedians who have been known to stand my presence for more than five seconds. They are few.


 * User:Johnsurname - He was blocked for exposing the truth behind Kerri-Anne Kennerley and her axis of evil.
 * User:SwitChar - He is my friend, and so, I stole his template dealie. But he suggested it. So I'm safe if any sort of lawsuit comes to hand.