User:CourtneyReko/Mbole people /Laylakeysor Peer Review

Peer review
This is where you will complete your peer review exercise. Please use the following template to fill out your review.

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing? CoutneyReko
 * Link to draft you're reviewing: User:CourtneyReko/sandbox

Lead
Guiding questions:


 * Has the Lead been updated to reflect the new content added by your peer?no
 * Does the Lead include an introductory sentence that concisely and clearly describes the article's topic? yes
 * Does the Lead include a brief description of the article's major sections? no
 * Does the Lead include information that is not present in the article? no
 * Is the Lead concise or is it overly detailed? The lead is concise however I think it may be a bit to concise adding info about the main topics of the article could improve this

Content
Guiding questions:


 * Is the content added relevant to the topic?yes
 * Is the content added up-to-date?yes
 * Is there content that is missing or content that does not belong? more info could be added on the metal work, wood work and raffia weaving that is briefly mentioned in the agriculture section these are forms of art as well

Tone and Balance
Guiding questions:


 * Is the content added neutral?yes
 * Are there any claims that appear heavily biased toward a particular position?no
 * Are there viewpoints that are overrepresented, or underrepresented? no
 * Does the content added attempt to persuade the reader in favor of one position or away from another?no

Sources and References
Guiding questions:


 * Is all new content backed up by a reliable secondary source of information?yes
 * Are the sources thorough - i.e. Do they reflect the available literature on the topic?yes
 * Are the sources current?yes
 * Check a few links. Do they work?yes

Organization
Guiding questions:


 * Is the content added well-written - i.e. Is it concise, clear, and easy to read?
 * Does the content added have any grammatical or spelling errors?yes In a list you should always include a period before the word and. Palm Oil should be two words and there there is now I in the end of Patriarchal. People does not used to be used twice in the sentence at the end of your religion section. "Spirits are an important aspect to Mbole religion" Should read aspect of.Using the before Mbole also makes it seem more like you're speaking about a culture and less like your'e speaking about an object in certain areas. The sentence on funerals should read "and a few weeks afterward" not "and few weeks afterward". through initiations not "trough initiations". "several torture such as whippings or beatings, and getting pepper on their bodies." Can be written as whippings, beatings or getting peppers on their bodies which is more readable and says the same thing. Place the word initiates in between the and eyes when talking about the plant infusion otherwise the word creates is grammatically incorrect.take the they out form in front of assist governing groups this is an unnecessary repetition within that sentence. Coma after the word death in the 6th paragraph on the lilawa society. Coma after this in second sentence of last lilawa society paragraph. should read paint in a line from the neck to the genitals not "form the  neck to the genitals." Comma after often in last sentence on sculpture
 * Is the content added well-organized - i.e. broken down into sections that reflect the major points of the topic? yes

Images and Media
Guiding questions: If your peer added images or media


 * Does the article include images that enhance understanding of the topic?
 * Are images well-captioned?n/a
 * Do all images adhere to Wikipedia's copyright regulations?n/a
 * Are the images laid out in a visually appealing way?n/a

For New Articles Only
If the draft you're reviewing is a new article, consider the following in addition to the above.


 * Does the article meet Wikipedia's Notability requirements - i.e. Is the article supported by 2-3 reliable secondary sources independent of the subject?
 * How exhaustive is the list of sources? Does it accurately represent all available literature on the subject?
 * Does the article follow the patterns of other similar articles - i.e. contain any necessary infoboxes, section headings, and any other features contained within similar articles?
 * Does the article link to other articles so it is more discoverable?

Overall impressions
Guiding questions:


 * Has the content added improved the overall quality of the article - i.e. Is the article more complete?yes
 * What are the strengths of the content added? the section on the lilawa is strong
 * How can the content added be improved?because the page already has an economy section i would suggest putting economic facts there and lettoing the agriculture be its own section i would also suggest moving the already existing info on the division of jobs between men and women and the info that you've added into a subcategory under culture.