User:Cworrell09/Lost in the Crowd/CatherineMLindsay Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Cworrell09


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Cworrell09/Lost_in_the_Crowd?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

What a great topic! I have not heard of this documentary before, so I am glad to learn of it. I am interested in seeing it.

RE: the lead: I wonder if the lead should just read: "Lost in the Crowd is a documentary film by Austrian filmmaker Susi Graf about LGBT homeless youth in New York City. The film premiered at the 2010 Frameline Film Festival." And then, perhaps create an "Story" section for the rest of the content currently contained in the lead: "The film tells the story of a group of kids focusing on how they became homeless and their attempts to survive on the streets of New York. Their struggles with addiction, sex work, and HIV are portrayed throughout the film and told by the featured personalities in the film. Most of the youth say the reason they are homeless is because they have been rejected by their families for being gay or transgender. The lives of LGBT youth in shelters are portrayed, as well as finding "new" families in the ballroom scene, featuring ballroom icon Willi Ninja who died shortly after being filmed for Lost in the Crowd."

Also: I was a little confused by the "The Neutral Zone" and "Sylvia's Place," at first. It wasn't clear to me how they connected to the documentary. I assume information about them is included because they are organizations that a feature prominently in the documentary...? If that is the case, I wonder if those sections should be subheadings positioned beneath a larger heading like "Featured Support Organizations." Perhaps the "Ballroom" section can be placed under that heading, too.

It might look something like this:

Lost in the Crowd

Lost in the Crowd is a documentary film by Austrian filmmaker Susi Graf about LGBT homeless youth in New York City. The film premiered at the 2010 Frameline Film Festival.

Story

The film tells the story of a group of kids focusing on how they became homeless and their attempts to survive on the streets of New York. Their struggles with addiction, sex work, and HIV are portrayed throughout the film and told by the featured personalities in the film. Most of the youth say the reason they are homeless is because they have been rejected by their families for being gay or transgender. The lives of LGBT youth in shelters are portrayed, as well as finding "new" families in the ballroom scene, featuring ballroom icon Willi Ninja who died shortly after being filmed for Lost in the Crowd.

Featured Support Organizations

The Neutral Zone

This shelter is known as a "drop-in" center. Youth can visit during the day, but overnight services are not offered. Statistics show that there are 20,000 to 32,000 youth on the streets of New York City. 40% of these youth are a member of the queer community. Based on these statistics, there are an estimated 8000 homeless LGBTQ youth, fighting to survive every struggle on the streets. Yet there are few places for them to turn. The Neutral Zone welcomes LBGTQ youth four nights a week to take haven in a safe, supervised, drug-free space. In the last three months alone, The Neutral Zone had 1247 drop-in visits and served almost 600 free meals.

Sylvia's Place

Sylvia's Place is a shelter which purpose is to function as an emergency accommodation in the sense of a place to safely sleep for queer youth who are homeless. They provide food, clothing, medical care, and basic services. It is located at the Metropolitan Community Church in Midtown New York, which also a food pantry.

Ballroom

Some of the personalities featured in the film are members of ballroom dance houses and take part in Ball culture. Alex and Serenity are members of the House of Ninja, founded by legend Willi Ninja who was featured in the documentary Paris Is Burning. Many queer people of color use ballroom as a form of refuge from the shelters or the street. House leaders see this as a positive influence on the kids since it gives them an opportunity to compete against other houses and builds self-esteem.

RE: References and sources: I would like some links and/or citations for the information contained in "The Neutral Zone" section.

RE: Images and media: I think adding the film's trailer or screen shots of the film to the page will enhance the information presented.

Overall, this article is concise; the content is neutral, and the information is well-sourced. Good job, Chris!