User:CyanCaribou/Stereotypes of Jews/Nr2023 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(CyanCaribou)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:CyanCaribou/Stereotypes_of_Jews?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Stereotypes of Jews

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Lead:

Has the lead been updated: A new lead has not been added yet; if this is something you plan on doing, maybe add that to your draft section. On this note, I think you could add a bit to the lead section. It does highlight what is to come in the article but is a bit brief.

Content

Is the content relevant: The new content you added is relevant and adds to the section in the article “Nice Jewish Boy.” I see they only have one sentence on Jewish male menstruation, so I think these are important contributions. However, depending on how much you plan to add to this section, you may want to create a new section in the article.

Is the content up to date: Yes, the two sources you used are fairly new.

Is there content that is missing or that does not belong: You maybe need more context when you start discussing the one-sex and two-sex model for readers to grasp how this relates. I think I understood this section well because I am in the class but it may be useful to add a bit more information. I think it makes sense to keep it with the Jewish male menstruation section but it needs a transition. Or is it possible to add this to the "history" section as you provide a historical context to these ideas?

Does the article deal with a Wiki equity gap: Yes it does, you are addressing a topic that has virtually no information on it so they are a highly underrepresented area

Tone and balance:

Is the content added neutral: The section you added is mostly written from a neutral point of view. The only sentence you may want to rephrase is "Stereotypes were not only because of their difference religion but due to the physical difference of Jewish men, who were circumcised". Could you instead say "stereotypes about Jewish men have been attributed to various factors such as differences in religion and cultural practices such as circumcision".

Sources and References:

Is all new content backed up by a reliable secondary source: Yes for the most part. Again the last sentence needs a reference. Another sentence that could use a reference would be "Another theory, according to Galen, was the idea of plethora, or getting rid of the excess blood, which was again a women's problem, due to their inefficiencies".

Are sources thorough: I like that you use the article we read in class. Maybe begin to look for more sources on the library website or google scholar.

Are the sources current: Yes

Are there better sources available: I see one of your citations was from a website. I read the bio of the author and I would agree that this is reliable, but maybe you could use the sources he provided in the reference section in place or in addition to it?

Organization:

Is the content you added well written: The flow of your contribution is good. I just think you need a bit mroe context for the one-sex and two-sex model. This is the only section that felt a little iffy to me when I was reading

Does the content added have any grammatical errors: Minimal grammatical errors. Maybe missing a few commas. Might be a good idea to put it through grammarly before publishing.