User:Danel216/Fast fashion/Commsstudent Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Danel216


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Danel216/Fast fashion


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Fast fashion

Evaluate the drafted changes
Lead


 * Has the Lead been updated to reflect the new content added by your peer? - A new lead has not been added, might not be needed as the sections you added are already on the main article.

Content


 * Is the content added relevant to the topic? - Yes the information you have added is relevant to the topic. Just make sure that this information is not already mentioned in the main article.
 * Is the content added up-to-date? - Yes the information added is up-to-date with one source from 2020.
 * Is there content that is missing or content that does not belong? - In the "advertisements for fast fashion" section, I would rename this section "YouTube and fast fashion" as that is your main focus.
 * Does the article deal with one of Wikipedia's equity gaps? Does it address topics related to historically underrepresented populations or topics? -

Tone and Balance


 * Is the content added neutral? - Yes, it is all very factual.

Sources and References


 * Is all new content backed up by a reliable secondary source of information? - No, there are only two sources mentioned and they are not linked properly in the edits. There needs to be more information as to where you got the environmental facts and the information about YouTube. This is not clear and at the moment is fraudulent.


 * A re the sources thorough - i.e. Do they reflect the available literature on the topic? - Because there are only 2 sources, they are not thorough enough. If you look on the library for school I'm sure you will find a lot of articles about this topic.
 * Are the sources written by a diverse spectrum of authors? Do they include historically marginalized individuals where possible? Yes, for example scholarship is written throughout different times giving it a varied/diverse perspective.
 * Are there better sources available, such as peer-reviewed articles in place of news coverage or random websites? - as mentioned above, there are more articles that back up your findings that make your information more reliable.

Organization


 * Is the content added well-written - i.e. Is it concise, clear, and easy to read ? - It is not clear to read this article, and it needs to be edited. If you read your article out loud you will find where your sentences need to be edited. The structure of your sentences is confusing at times and it is not clear what you are attempting to say.
 * Does the content added have any grammatical or spelling errors? I would go back through your article to look at the spelling mistakes and the structure issues. Here are my suggestions:

-In the "Issues About Fast Fashion" change the title to "Issues Surrounding Fast Fashion", as well in the first sentence, instead of saying "by the years" say "more over time" or "over time" or "throughout time"

- Also, be mindful of your wording when you say "Since the fashion trends change every season, fashion brands need to overstock all of their stores so customers can keep their satisfaction while continue to shop for a while until the season arrives" - saying "shop for a while" does not make sense in this sentence. It should be much clearer as to what you are trying to say. Be aware of the conversational and biased language you are using, like "since". Also, change to "so customers continue to shop and are satisfied with the stock in the stores".

- "When compared to before the year 2000, fashion brands are now producing nearly twice as much clothing. Today, fashion brands produce almost twice the amount of clothing before 2000." This is the same sentence said twice. Try to be clearer in your structure.


 * Is the content added well-organized - i.e. broken down into sections that reflect the major points of the topic? - Yes, it is organized into clear sections.

Overall impressions


 * Has the content added improved the overall quality of the article - i.e. Is the article more complete?/How can the content added be improved? - It's a little difficult to tell at the moment. I think that after editing and reviewing the original article to make sure you are not repeating any already published information, then your edits will improve the article.
 * What are the strengths of the content added? - The strengths are that you added information that made it simpler to understand the impacts of fast fashion where the original article did not. You made it clear for the reader to understand what is wrong with fast fashion and the impacts of the industry. well done! :)

- Joanna