User:Danel216/Fast fashion/Sjohn194 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Danel216


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Danel216/Fast fashion
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Fast fashion

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Content: The content of this addition appears more like a persuasive essay than an informational piece. The advertising section is an interesting concept and could be a good addition to the article, however the grammatical errors and lack of citations make it challenging to understand.

Tone and Balance: This contribution displays a fairly strong bias against the topic, especially since the article is currently flagged as displaying too much opinion and needing more of an encyclopedic tone. The use of the word "issues" in section titles may display too much bias, so "impacts" may be a more balanced choice. The use of "usually" in "customers are usually fashion lovers" can be taken as filler, and is not proven by a source.

Sources and References: This contribution would be greatly strengthen by citing unbiased sources. Claims like "fast fashion is a business that has massively grown over the course of the years" could benefit from a citation that would allow readers to examine the numbers on the growth of the industry. The sentence "when compared to before the year 2000, fashion brands are now producing nearly twice as much clothing. Today, fashion brands produce almost twice the amount of clothing before 2000" will also need a citation. As well, the citations should be done using the automatic feature within Wikipedia rather than MLA/APA etc.

Organization: There is already an environmental impacts section in the article, so you may wish to put your contributions there.

Images and Media: The article has very few images, so you may wish to add some with your contribution.

Overall Impressions: Bias and citation were significant challenges for the article. While it is a topic that evokes strong emotions, it is important to remember the criteria for Wikipedia contributions.