User:Denizmasjedi/Empowerment/Taylor.daws Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Denizmasjedi


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Denizmasjedi/Empowerment?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Empowerment

Evaluate the drafted changes
In terms of content I think your organization is very clear and your information is very thorough. A suggestion I have that I mentioned int he other peer review is to maybe add some points in support of a job-first approach in order to make the piece more neutral and avoid over-representing the bottom-up perspective of aiding refugees. I also think that in the second paragraph the sentence "The role of the government has become limited and they attempt to solve poverty in the cheapest manner possible" is a little progressive leaning. I would focus on improving the neutral voice to balance out progressive and conservative viewpoints. However, I know this is a difficult task for you topic.

Overall, I found the information you added very relevant and is a great addition to the article on empowerment. My biggest suggestion is just making your voice more neutral in the ways I mentioned above in order to ensure you have equal representation of opinions.

Citations

The links you added to the citations that started in "doi" did not work for me so I would see if there are general use links that you are able to add. I would also suggest adding links to the citations that do not have them so that people are able to easily access these sources. Also I noticed that some of your sources you used multiple times, but they had different numbers assigned to them. Did you add a new source every time you cited or for sources that you used multiple times did you click the "re-use" button on the citation tab. I think each source is supposed to have only one number assigned to it, not multiple. Despite these factors, your sources look very reliable and you did a great job using a variety of sources.