User:DeonJWebb/sandbox

== Unemployment has been shown to have a negative impact on an individual's emotional well-being, self-esteem and more broadly their mental health. Increasing unemployment has been show to have a significant impact on mental health, predominantly depressive disorders. This is an important consideration when reviewing the triggers for mental health disorders in any population survey. In order to improve your emotional mental health, the root of the issue has to be resolved. "Prevention emphasizes the avoidance of risk factors; promotion aims to enhance an individual's ability to achieve a positive sense of self-esteem, mastery, well-being, and social inclusion." It is very important to improve your emotional mental health by surrounding yourself with positive relationships. We as humans, feed off companionships and interaction with other people. Another way to improve your emotional mental health is participating in activities that can allow you to relax and take time for yourself. '''For many people, having fun at a party, the excitement of new experiences, finding the right partner, achieving professional success, and being rich all ways of being happy. Those are all wonderful experiences to be cherished and cultivated but they are not happiness. Money and fame don’t mean everything and everyone with those things are not happy. You must figure out how to make your day in and day out happy, otherwise you will be impatient and try to buy happiness with your money. Happiness cannot be found in an end result, only the journey. There are 2 kinds of happiness, temporary and long lasting. Temporary happiness can be for example a lot of things that have to do with material happiness. Long lasting happiness is a deep fulfillment of your inner core. If you are not happy right now you need to do something different. You must break your patterns and look at life from a different perspective. Figuring yourself out is the first step in the path of getting you to a happy place the quickest. Happiness is a powerful thing to possess in life. A lot of people think they have, and very few embody it. Purpose is a fancy word for happiness, it makes you ask yourself why you are doing something or who you are doing it for. Happiness is when your life fulfills your needs. Happiness comes when you feel satisfied and fulfilled. Happiness is a feeling of contentment, that life is just as it should be. Perfect happiness, enlightenment, comes when you have all of your needs satisfied. We are all taught that striving to be happy and stay happy. ''' ==

Wenqi's Feedback
You provided with important information about how to keep mental healthy. But, I'd like to you follow the language style and genre conventions in a Wikipedia article. Wikipedia readers expect concise, straight, and direct information/facts. Rather than say "XXXX is not XXX', you can directly say "What is what". In your Wikipedia article, in the section you are editing, the example about Yoga was mentioned. Following the way that the prior author talked about the Yoga example. Also, avoid ambiguous words such as "a lot of" and words implying persuasion such as "you" "must" "we" etc.

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0033350606003015

https://ac.els-cdn.com/S0277953612002754/1-s2.0-S0277953612002754-main.pdf?_tid=15f01d1a-2e65-4838-a67d-9a01326a0584&acdnat=1550637020_0a67e288afdf62213788ab8f32b72208

http://scholar.google.com/scholar_url?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.researchgate.net%2Fprofile%2FEspen_Roysamb%2Fpost%2FCan_anybody_suggest_references_regarding_Ryffs_psychological_well-being_model%2Fattachment%2F59d63616c49f478072ea3db0%2FAS%253A273644012408832%25401442253224136%2Fdownload%2FRyff%2B1989.pdf&hl=en&sa=T&oi=gga&ct=gga&cd=0&d=3610153249957647160&ei=b9xsXNy4G5uxygSD3ZCwDQ&scisig=AAGBfm3av_29HRYQDY4wRukHJ4odNu4h_w&nossl=1&ws=1920x937&at=Happiness%20is%20everything%2C%20or%20is%20it%3F%20Explorations%20on%20the%20meaning%20of%20psychological%20well-being.&bn=1

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/BF01207052

Timothy's Edits
For many people, having fun at a party, the excitement of new experiences, finding the right partner, achieving professional success, and being rich [are] all ways of being happy. [While these]  Those are all wonderful experiences to be cherished and cultivated[,] ''' but they are not happiness. {Money and fame don’t mean everything and everyone with those things are not happy.} <(this sentence doesn't read right) You must figure out how to make your day in and day out happy, otherwise you will be impatient and try to buy happiness with your money.  [;] [h]appiness cannot be found in an end result, only the journey. There are 2 kinds of happiness, temporary and long lasting. {Temporary happiness can be for example a lot of things that have to do with material happiness.} <(fragmented sentence) Long lasting happiness is a deep fulfillment of your inner core. If you are not happy right now you need to do something different. You must break your patterns and look at life from a different perspective. Figuring yourself out is the first step in the path of getting you to a happy place the quickest. Happiness is a powerful thing to possess in life[,] [a] lot of people think they have, and very few embody it. Purpose is a fancy word for happiness, it makes you ask yourself why you are doing something or who you are doing it for. Happiness is when your life fulfills your needs. Happiness comes when you feel satisfied and fulfilled. Happiness is a feeling of contentment, that life is just as it should be. Perfect happiness, enlightenment, comes when you have all of your needs satisfied. We are all taught that striving to be happy and stay happy. '''

I like your information. Once, you add your citations, this should read pretty well. Most Wiki articles tend to stay away from using the word 'you', but the section you are adding this to already uses 'you' throughout so I think this should be fine. For your sentences, I suggest staying away from fragmented sentences. Even though most of us use them in everyday conversation, they should probably be avoided here.

Cody's Edits
For your article, I suggest adding citations to some of your sentences. You need to make sure you cite the author who originally write it, even  though you paraphrased  it. This will allow the readers to have a connection to an external author which proves credibility. Without it they  might  not believe it’s true, just because you didn’t cite an author. Also, avoid using numbers and spell  them out, it looks neater and more professional. Here is  a section I found  that I think you can reword better. “Another way to improve your emotional mental health is participating in activities that can allow you to relax and take time for yourself. For many people, having fun at a party, the excitement of new experiences, finding the right partner, achieving professional success, and being rich all ways of being happy.” Try to organize this better and shorten as well. “For many  people” you could say “For example, some people enjoy parties, new experiences, finding a partner, as well as achieving goals, are ways of improving  your mental, and emotional health.” As for  this section: “'''Temporary happiness can be for example a lot of things that have to do with material happiness. Long lasting happiness is a deep fulfillment of your inner core. If you are not happy right now you need to do something different.”''' “Temporary happiness needs to be explained  more so  the author understands what you are trying to achieve. Check for spelling and Grammatical errors as well. Overall it is a good topic, but it does need a little work  just in using different wording, and shortening of some sentences. Remember to cite  your sources as well in your article to give the author(s) credit.