User:DocumentaryJones69/sandbox

2013-2020
=== (I was dared to put this on wikipedia, none of this actually happened unless you want to believe it happened, if so, I am not at fault for the spread of misinformation, Besides, its Wikipedia, did you actually expect to find real information here?) ===

January, 2013
On January 5th, 2013. Unidentified Objects dropped into the sea into jellyfish fields. On January 6th, these objects turned out to be Wassertank IVs, a new addition to the arsenal of the Vampir-Reich. These tanks fired upon bikini bottom military and civilians alike, leaving only Second lieutenant Spongebob Squarepants and Gunnery Sergeant Patrick Star to tell the story, This event is known as bloody bottom. thus sparking the 7 Year long war that would take the lives of 500,000 Nazis, and 600,000 Bikini Bottom Military personnel.

February, 2013
One month after the start of this war. Nazi troops dropped from U-boats all across bikini bottom, in their military bases, their schools, even the dump which caused 629 Nazi scouts to suffocate in the trash which may have been a stupid move on their part. The bikini bottom marine corps(BBMC) were doing everything they could to no avail. At this rate it appeared that the B.B armed forces were losing. Despite this, lieutenant Squarepants and Sergeant Star continued to fight, even after the horrors they've seen.

March of 2013-December of 2013
Heavy fighting raged on in the streets between the 69th SS Panzer Divisions and the BBMC. Neither side could make a push because of the raging trench warfare like 1915. Nazi troops could not move fast without U-boats and Wassertanks, which were still prototypes. When the Nazis could advance on the BBMC, they hit hard, devastating any military and civilian presence in the area. At this point. 563 Germans and 50,466 BBMC personnel have died in this bloody conflict, the water around major battlegrounds were saturated with a red tint.

January of 2014
The war has been going on for over a year now. New weapons like the weird looking but effective german MP2014 and the bikini bottomite tank. These new advances in each sides technology would change warfare, with the MP2014s high rate of fire with 64 round magazine of 9x39mm and the bottomite tanks ability to travel underwater without protection speeding things up.

February 2014-August 2014
In the middle of february of 2014, the Wassertank was upgraded. Its mobility has been increased after German engineers captured a Bottomite Tank and studied its tracks. When the Wassertank was improved, armor clashes became extremely common in the war of bikini bottom. The biggest armor clash being in the battle of the sea needle(March-August), where 500 tanks on each side were destroyed or lost.

September 2014-December 2017
Data about this timespan is mostly lost, but here are some of the more important battles that took place between september 2014 and june 2017. Battles marked with a * Included LT. Squarepants and G.SGT. Star

* The Battle of Glove World, June 2015: Infantry Battle, 42,093 Dead.

The burning of kelp forest, September 2015: Infantry battle, 20,000 Dead.

The Defense of the Hospital, December 2016: Mixed battle, 324 Dead.

The first bombing of Atlantis, July 2017: Bombing, 3,953 Dead.

The massacre of December 15th, 2017: an absolute slaughter, 20,325 Dead.

September 2018-August 2019
In September of 2018, The Nazis played a move that caused them many unnecessary problems. The second bombing of Atlantis. The devastation caused by this caught the attention of King Neptune. In August of 2019, after a skirmish between the 2nd Waffen SS Panzer Army and the 5th Armored Bottomite Division, a small group of Wasserstukas suddenly got slung out of the sky, before the fleet of atlantis began to show up. After this, for once, both sides in the war were evenly matched.

January, 2020
The Nazis made many decisions that caused their decline in victories, such as awakening atlantis, and destroying the kelp forest. In January of 2020, all the destruction finally triggers the man himself, Poseidon. Soon the entirety of the Vampir-Kriegsmarine were concentrated on the desecrated ruins of bikini bottom itself. Every building was reduced to a dangerous, broken down mess, some were outright piles of rubble. Except one.

July, 2020
The Kriegsmarine General, Peter Danns, and his high ranking officers made a swift base out of the intact building. Obersturmführers Harold and Rudolf made a mistake that ultimately cost them the war. Harold entered a room with a black and gold chest in the middle with a safe on the wall, Rudolf broke open the safe, to find a glass bottle with a piece of paper inside it. Then the two nazis heard a sentence from a man who still makes the Vampir-Reichstag Shiver in fear.

“Aye…Trying to steal me secret formuler aren't you me boys.”

August, 2020
After the Nazi force in the krusty krab was eliminated, Five Star General Eugene H. Krabs bravely boarded the Nazi U-Boat and slaughtered any Nazi in his way. Making his way to the bridge, he used his Krabby Klaws to destroy the console, then fought his way to the Reactor room. Once again, he used his claws of titanium to damage the reactor, escaping before the entire U-Boat went up in glorious flames and fireballs. Nazi protocol engaged the remaining kriegsmarine to suicide, while the few hundred waffen ss fought to their last breath.

November, 2020
On November 3rd, 2020. The BBMC enclosed the last of the Waffen SS in the kriegsmarine and finished them off, marking the end of a bloody, 7 year long conflict that took the lives of 600,000 innocent bikini bottomites, and 500,000 beasts in human skin.

For some reason we don't teach or inform kids of this totally(Not) Real, and terrible war in schools.
We also don't dedicate November 3rd to the heroes of the totally real war of bikini bottom.

We should always remember the sacrifice, and the struggle that the Bikini Bottom Marine Corps faced during this horrific conflict that totally happened. And be sure to stay prepared if something like this ever happens again.