User:Dog ocean/Starbucks/Goldenen01 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Dog ocean


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Dog ocean/Starbucks - Wikipedia
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Starbucks - Wikipedia

Evaluate the drafted changes
The content is there and it's relevant, it's just a little too concise. I think you could elaborate more on the points you're making, and details being mentioned, so it doesn't seem as robotic and spitting out information. It's neutral, but it does feel a little critical of global warming because of the solely negative tone. The sources seem to be reputable, though the one is a little old. At the end, Columbia is mentioned but it wasn't in the beginning when listing where the coffee beans are sourced from--I think adding this would give some clarity to the final point of how they're combatting the issues. Also, transitioning into that better would make it more sensible sine the rest of the paragraph is in the opposite light. Grammatically, I think the sentences are typically a little blunt. You could combine them and as I said before, elaborate more, so it isn't as choppy.