User:Dr Aaij/Naaz review

Review
I'm looking at Naaz (singer)

First four points

 * First, what does the article do well? Is there anything from your review that impressed you? Any turn of phrase that described the subject in a clear way?
 * The best part of the article is how complete it is in terms of records and releases and dates, but wait for it...
 * What changes would you suggest the author apply to the article? Why would those changes be an improvement?
 * ...that's also the worst part--to a great extent, that is all there is, one set of facts after another.
 * What's the most important thing the author could do to improve the article?
 * Find reliable sources that allow you to write actual prose, actual text.
 * Did you notice anything about the article you reviewed that could be applicable to your own article? Let them know!
 * Well, the structure is fine, and the discography and those track lists are good; I'd copy and adapt those.

The five elements

 * A lead section that is easy to understand
 * The lead is short, and doesn't take into account her second album, her touring, her awards, etc. Plus it has little about her life.
 * A clear structure
 * Well, structure is fine: short biography, then career, then all the facts about awards and records.
 * Balanced coverage
 * Hard to say: there just isn't that much prose content. In comparing the prose text with the facts, there's more of that factual stuff, and it turns out that much of the prose is just facts but told in prose, not as a list.
 * Neutral content
 * I suppose so: the subject is treated neutrally but, again, there's not much here beyond basic facts.
 * Reliable sources
 * That's problematic: there's an Amazon link, there's a bunch of websites and news outlets (?) whose reliability is hard to gauge, like this one (which actually looks decent) and this one, which looks like a combination between a fan page ("Melanie Martinez’s creative drive and talents have always distinguished her from other musicians") and a thing that sells tickets.
 * There are plenty of things that really just aren't sourced. The tour with Hayley Kiyoko--it's not sourced, so I can't tell what it meant. Did the Lesbian Jesus pick Naaz herself? Did they appear on stage together? Or was it just a business deal and it meant nothing at all? Reliable secondary sourcing will tell us that.

Copy edits
Check for Wikilinks: the Edisons need to be linked in that Awards section--and the section title needs to be corrected for capitalization.