User:Drabkin247/Judy Freespirit/Purplelily21 Peer Review

General info
(provide username) Drabkin247
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing User:Drabkin247/Judy Freespirit:
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists) :

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Second Review

You have added more information to this revision, which is good! I think there are still areas that need further revision, though, especially to improve the grammar, syntax, clarity, etc. of your writing. I've marked areas that should be improved. Be sure to also look through yourself and edit the writing. In general, I think your writing could be a little more formal and clear. You should also be sure to link to other wikipedia articles throughout your entry. Additionally, there were a few spots where you could elaborate a little more, such as by talking about the Fat Liberator Press.

Judy Freespirit (1936-2010) was a 20th century American feminist and activist in the late 1900s, best known for her role in the Fat Liberation Movement and the LGBTQ and Disability Rights Movements. She was one of the founders of the Fat Underground, a fat feminist group, and she was a proponent of the Radical Therapy Movement (Can you link to any other wikipedia pages?). In addition, she wrote many books about the fight for social change for fat women and LGBTQ women. As a part of the Fat Underground, she wrote the "Fat Liberation Manifesto," demanding rights and social change for fat women.

Biography[edit]
Born In 1936, Judy Freespirit was raised in Detroit, Michigan, born into a working-class family (Maybe Judy Freespirit was born in Detroit, Michigan in 1936 to a working class family). In her early childhood, she dealt with incestuous abuse from her father, and her mother constantly fat-shamed her and restricted her diet. She grew up clinging to dance and theater for her only sources of enjoyment, got married at an early age, and began working in a psychiatric hospital. Then, as she became increasingly involved in the Women’s Liberation Movement in the late 1970's, she came out as a lesbian and left her husband and children. Freespirit went on to become an activist and writer for a plethora of issues she faced in her daily life, with the subjects being focusing on lesbian identity/rights?, fat acceptance, disability rights, and incest survival. An example of such activism can be seen in her work, “Fat Liberation Manifesto,” in which she is praised for breaking the barriers of LGBTQ+ and fat acceptance (this wording is weird). She passed away due to various health complications in 2010.

The Fat Underground[edit]
The Radical Therapy movement and the Fat Pride movement of the 1970s that Freespirit participated in influenced the rise of the Fat Underground movement. The Radical Therapy movement was against the mystified oppression (What does this mean?) of mental illnesses and believed that they should be treated by changing society. Additionally, the Fat Pride movement was against social inequality because of weight. Through these movements, the Fat Underground was able to take shape, combining ideas from both movements. Judy Freespirit and Sara Golda Bracha Fishman founded the organization as a National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance (NAAFA) chapter in Los Angeles. They believed that weight loss through medical treatment was a mystified oppression and that public health specialists were omitting research findings to play into the exploitations of the weight-loss industry. The Fat Underground supported the notion that a majority of fat individuals could not “cure” themselves through dieting because being fat was biological. They brought evidence from medical libraries and primary sources to fight against the anti-fat biases. This stance got received conflicting responses from the main NAAFA, leading Freespirit and her supporters to quit the NAAFA. They launched the Fat Underground as its own separate organization, numbering five members.

The Fat Underground became the most well-known organization isolated from the NAAFA. Freespirit was able to give gave lectures, protested dieting clinics, and spread the organization’s views through the “Fat Liberation Manifesto.” The Fat Underground disbanded in 1983 as many members left Los Angeles, and the last member, Reanna Fagan, passed away.

Her Books[edit]
Throughout her life, Judy Freespirit wrote many books, as well as co-wrote the "Fat Liberation Manifesto." Written by Freespirit and fellow Fat Underground member, Aldebaran (Who is this?), the manifesto revolved around the ideas that "fat people are fully deserving of human respect, demanded equal rights for fat people, and viewed the struggle to end fat oppression as 'allied with the struggles of other oppressed groups.'" The manifesto publicized the oppression of fat women and encouraged people to change their opinions about fatness. Overall, the Fat Liberation Manifesto sparked the Fat Liberation Movement, uniting fat women around the nation to fight for agency of their bodies.

Along with the Fat Liberation Manifesto, Freespirit wrote four books: Keeping it in the Family, Whole Lotta Quakin' Goin' On, A Slim Volume of Fat Poems, and Daddy's Girl. As a childhood sexual abuse survivor, she wrote the book Daddy's Girl: An Incest Survivor Story to change the general understanding that childhood sexual abuse can cause lesbianism. In addition to refuting these ideas, the book also told of how lesbian sex played a part in her healing. She does this by combining the protagonist's memories of her relationship with her father, with the experiences of her current female lover. The idea was that in focusing on her current relationship, she could take "a degree of control and power over her sexuality that her father deprived her of as a child." This book discussed the connection between incest and lesbian identity. It was influential in teaching about healing and acceptance, and inspired more writings by lesbian survivors. Freespirit's public readings of Daddy's Girl provided opportunities for survivors to come together, share their stories, and find solidarity. These events were held in women's bookstores, creating an atmosphere that prioritized the voices and experiences of women and girls. She eventually received requests from female therapists to use the book for patients, even for male survivors. However, she established that all of her work was "for women only." By addressing these issues head-on, she contributed to a more nuanced understanding of how personal experiences shape one's identity. Her willingness to explore sensitive topics with raw honesty demonstrated her commitment to personal healing and the empowerment of others.

Similar to "Daddy's Girl," Freespirit wrote the book "Keeping it in the Family," which is about a "fat, disabled, middle-aged, Jewish lesbian" who is dealing with her childhood sexual abuse. In this book, the protagonist realizes that her story connects with her ancestors, and thus, she writes about the effects of incest through generations. These two books relate to the idea of the healing process for lesbian survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Her writings made an impact on survivors dealing with the connection between their childhood abuse and accepting their current sexuality. Her piece, "A Slim Volume of Fat Poems," was a chapbook in which different authors published poems about fat empowerment. Finally, her book "A Whole Lotta Quakin' Goin' On" was a memoir about the 1969 earthquake in San Francisco.

Contributions to Feminism[edit]
Judy Freespirit was a pivotal figure in the fat liberation movement, and her contributions played a significant role in shaping the discourse around fat acceptance and feminism. Freespirit co-organized the first Feminist Fat Activist Working Meeting in April of 1980, along with Judith Stein and Diane Denne.This event marked an important transition in the movement, providing a platform for fat women to come together, share their experiences, and advocate for their rights. She was a passionate advocate for the rights and dignity of fat individuals. Through her work, she sought to challenge societal norms and the oppressive narratives surrounding fatness. Freespirit's efforts created a space where fat women could voice their perspectives, challenge fat myths, and address the various forms of discrimination and prejudice they faced. One of Freespirit's legacies is her involvement with the publication of "Shadow on a Tightrope: Writings by Women on Fat Oppression." Alongside Lisa Schoenfielder and Barb Wieser, Freespirit helped compile this anthology, which featured both published and unpublished works from the Fat Liberator Press (Can you talk about this press earlier? It sounds important) in which the book examines the perspectives of women with larger body sizes, addressing prevalent myths, societal stereotypes, and the exclusion of these individuals from various “activities like dancing and sports”. It further discusses the challenges of enduring harassment, social isolation, and medical bias, portraying these women as survivors navigating a landscape marked by stigma and adversity. This collection provided a platform for fat women to express their experiences, struggles, and successes in the face of societal biases and prejudices.

Through her contributions, Judy Freespirit also played a role in highlighting the intersectionality of fat activism and feminism. The anthology "Shadow on a Tightrope" tackled issues related to body image, social stigma, harassment, and medical violence, all of which are intertwined with the broader feminist discourse. Freespirit's work emphasized that the fight for body acceptance is an important component of the feminist struggle for equality and empowerment. Freespirit's advocacy and her impact resonated internationally as her efforts were inspired fat activists in Great Britain, as evidenced by the formation of the London Fat Women's Group and subsequent events. While the group eventually faced challenges and dissolved, its existence marked a significant step towards creating a supportive community for fat women in the UK.

Additionally, Judy Freespirit, along with her collaborator Aldebaran (Sara Golda Bracha Fishman), made contributions to the fat liberation movement, using radical feminist therapy to expose the cultural mechanisms that oppressed fat women, particularly within the field of medicine. Together with Lynn Mabel-Lois (later Lynn McAfee), they formed their own NAAFA (National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance) chapter in Los Angeles, demonstrating their commitment to challenging anti-fat bias within medical practices. Judy Freespirit's contributions to the fat liberation movement and her advocacy for the rights of fat individuals had lasting impact. Her work provided a platform for marginalized voices and also demonstrated the intersectionality of fat activism and feminism. Through her efforts, Freespirit played a crucial role in reshaping societal perceptions of fatness and advocating for the acceptance and dignity of all bodies.

In present-day conversations surrounding survivor advocacy and LGBTQ issues, Judy Freespirit's work is often acknowledged as an early instance of intersectional feminism. Her impact helped to shape broader perspectives on how society interprets and engages with the stories of survivors and the LGBTQ community. Freespirit's contributions have set a precedent for other marginalized voices, encouraging them to share their narratives authentically. This has played a role in cultivating a more diverse and inclusive literary landscape, particularly in spaces that prioritize and validate the experiences of women and lesbians. Through her efforts to challenge stereotypes and promote a nuanced understanding of trauma and sexuality, Judy Freespirit has made a lasting impression on advocacy movements, motivating individuals to express their truths and confront societal misconceptions.

Overall, your entry has a lot of good ideas and information. You clearly demonstrate why Judy Freespirit was an important figure. I do think the biggest place for improvement is improving your word choice, grammar, clarity, and so on, which you should focus on as you do further revisions in order to improve your writing overall. I've noted places where writing is awkward, confusing, repetitive, or otherwise could be improved, so be sure to pay attention to that as you revise. I've made comments in parenthesis and bold. Let me know if you have any questions! - Sara

Lead[edit]
Judy Freespirit (Add dates for birth and death) was an American feminist and activist in the late 1900s, best known for her role in the Fat Liberation Movement and the LGBTQ and Disability Rights Movements. She was one of the founders of the Fat Underground, a fat feminist group, and she was a proponent of the Radical Therapy Movement. In addition, she wrote many books about the fight for social change for fat women and LGBTQ women. As a part of the Fat Underground, she wrote the "Fat Liberation Manifesto," demanding rights and social change for fat women. Judy Freespirit was one of the leaders of the Fat Liberation Movement, and her contributions to feminism went on to inspire others to fight for the rights of fat women, the disabled, and LGBTQ women. (The last sentence feels redundant and makes the lead section a little too long)

Biography[edit]
Born In 1936, Freespirit was raised in Detroit, Michigan, being born into a working-class family. (Wording is akward) Her early childhood was plagued by incestuous abuse from her father, and her mother constantly fat-shamed her and restricted her diet. She grew up clinging to dance and theater for her only sources of true enjoyment, got married at an early age, and began working in a psychiatric hospital. Then, as she became increasingly involved in the Women’s Liberation Movement in the late 1900s (Give a more specific decade), she came out as a lesbian and left her husband and children. Freespirit went on to become an activist and writer for a plethora of issues she faced in her daily life, with the subjects being lesbian, fat acceptance, disability rights, and incestuous survival. An example of such activism can be seen in her work “Fat Liberation Manifesto,” in which she is praised for breaking the barriers of LGBTQ+ and fat acceptance. She passed away due to various health complications in 2010, yet her legacy lives on until today.

Organizations[edit]
Judy Freespirit was an active fat liberalist who was at the forefront of multiple movements. She was a part of the Fat liberation movement and Radical Therapy movement. Her most notable contribution was in the Fat Underground movement. (These sentences seem repetitive of what has already been said)

The Radical Therapy movement and the Fat Pride movement of the 1970s that Freespirit participated in influenced the rise of the Fat Underground movement. The Radical Therapy movement was against the mystified oppression of mental illnesses and believed that they should be treated by changing society. Additionally, the Fat Pride movement was against social inequality because of weight. Through these movements, the Fat Underground was able to take shape, combining ideas from both movements. Judy Freespirit and Sara Golda Bracha Fishman founded the organization as a National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance (NAAFA) chapter in Los Angeles. They believed that weight loss through medical treatment was a mystified oppression and that public health specialists were omitting research findings to play into the exploitations of the weight-loss industry. The Fat Underground supported the notion that a majority of fat individuals could not “cure” themselves through dieting because being fat was biological. They brought evidence from medical libraries and primary sources to fight against the anti-fat bias. This stance brought conflicting responses from the main NAAFA, leading Freespirit and her supporters to quit the NAAFA. They launched the Fat Underground as its own separate organization, numbering five members.

The Fat Underground became the most well-known organization that isolated itself from the NAAFA. Freespirit was able to give lectures, protest dieting clinics, and spread the organization’s views through the “Fat Liberation Manifesto.” The Fat Underground disbanded in 1983 as many members left Los Angeles, and the last member, Reanna Fagan, passed away.

(This section seems to focus on the Fat Underground in particular, so might be better to rename the section that. Also, some of the wording here is a little awkward or informal and could be improved by further revision).

Her Books[edit]
Throughout her life, Judy Freespirit wrote many books, as well as co-wrote the Fat Underground's "Fat Liberation Manifesto." (Awkward wording) Written by Freespirit and fellow Fat Underground member, Aldebaran (Is that their full name?), the manifesto revolved around the ideas that "fat people are fully deserving of human respect, demanded equal rights for fat people, and viewed the struggle to end fat oppression as 'allied with the struggles of other oppressed groups.'" The manifesto publicized the oppression of fat women and encouraged people to change their opinions about fatness. Overall, the Fat Liberation Manifesto sparked the Fat Liberation Movement, uniting fat women around the nation to fight for agency of their bodies.

Along with the Fat Liberation Manifesto, Freespirit wrote four books: "Keeping it in the Family," "Whole Lotta Quakin' Goin' On," "A Slim Volume of Fat Poems," and "Daddy's Girl." (Books are usually italicized and not put in quotes) As a childhood sexual abuse survivor, she wrote the chapbook (unsure what exactly this is? May want to define it or change wording to just book) "Daddy's Girl: An Incest Survivor Story" to change the general understanding that childhood sexual abuse can cause lesbianism. In addition to refuting these ideas, the book also told of how lesbian sex played a part in her healing. She does this by combining the protagonist's relationship memories (wording is confusing) of her father with the experiences of her current female lover. The idea was that in focusing on her current relationship, she could take "a degree of control and power over her sexuality that her father deprived her of as a child." This book discussed the connection between incest and lesbian identity. It was influential in teaching about healing and acceptance, and inspired more writings by lesbian survivors. Freespirit's public readings of "Daddy's Girl" provided opportunities for survivors to come together, share their stories, and find solidarity. These events were held in women's bookstores, creating an atmosphere that prioritized the voices and experiences of women and girls. She eventually received requests from female therapists to use the book for patients, even for male survivors. However, she established that all of her work was "for women only." By addressing these issues head-on, she contributed to a more nuanced understanding of how personal experiences shape one's identity. Her willingness to explore sensitive topics with raw honesty demonstrated her commitment to personal healing and the empowerment of others. Similar to "Daddy's Girl," Freespirit wrote the book "Keeping it in the Family," which is about a "fat, disabled, middle-aged, Jewish lesbian" who is dealing with her childhood sexual abuse. In this book, the protagonist realizes that her story connects with her ancestors, and thus, she writes about the effects of incest through generations. These two books relate to the idea of the healing process for lesbian survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Her writings made an impact on survivors dealing with the connection between their childhood abuse and accepting their current sexuality. Her piece, "A Slim Volume of Fat Poems," was a chapbook in which different authors published poems about fat empowerment. Finally, her book "A Whole Lotta Quakin' Goin' On" was a memoir about the 1969 earthquake in San Francisco. (This paragraph is rather long. You might want to break it up)

Contributions to Feminism[edit]
Judy Freespirit was a pivotal figure in the fat liberation movement, and her contributions played a significant role in shaping the discourse around fat acceptance and feminism. Freespirit co-organized the first Feminist Fat Activist Working Meeting in April of 1980, along with Judith Stein and Diane Denne.This event marked an important transition in the movement, providing a platform for fat women to come together, share their experiences, and advocate for their rights. She was a passionate advocate for the rights and dignity of fat individuals. Through her work, she sought to challenge societal norms and dismantle the oppressive narratives surrounding fatness. Freespirit's efforts were instrumental in creating a space where fat women could voice their perspectives, challenge fat myths, and address the various forms of discrimination and prejudice they faced. One of Freespirit's enduring legacies is her involvement with the publication of "Shadow on a Tightrope: Writings by Women on Fat Oppression." Alongside Lisa Schoenfielder and Barb Wieser, Freespirit helped compile this anthology, which featured both published and unpublished works from the Fat Liberator Press, “In the book, fat women shared their perspectives on fat myths, fat legacies, and social stigma that excluded fat people from activities like dancing and sports, enduring harassment and isolation, medical violence toward fat folk, and seeing fat women as survivors of all of this”. (This is a rather long quote. Try to integrate quotes into your own words) This collection provided a platform for fat women to express their experiences, struggles, and successes in the face of societal biases and prejudices.

Through her contributions, Judy Freespirit also played a crucial role in highlighting the intersectionality of fat activism and feminism. The anthology "Shadow on a Tightrope" tackled issues related to body image, social stigma, harassment, and medical violence, all of which are deeply intertwined with the broader feminist discourse. Freespirit's work emphasized that the fight for body acceptance is an essential component of the feminist struggle for equality and empowerment. Freespirit's advocacy and her impact resonated internationally as her efforts were influential in inspiring fat activists in Great Britain, as evidenced by the formation of the London Fat Women's Group and subsequent events. While the group eventually faced challenges and dissolved, its existence marked a significant step towards creating a supportive community for fat women in the UK.

Additionally, Judy Freespirit, along with her collaborator Aldebaran (Sara Golda Bracha Fishman), made significant contributions to the fat liberation movement, using radical feminist therapy to expose the cultural mechanisms that oppressed fat women, particularly within the field of medicine. Together with Lynn Mabel-Lois (later Lynn McAfee), they formed their own NAAFA (National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance) chapter in Los Angeles, demonstrating their commitment to challenging anti-fat bias within medical practices. Judy Freespirit's contributions to the fat liberation movement and her advocacy for the rights of fat individuals had a profound and lasting impact. Her work not only provided a platform for marginalized voices but also underscored the intersectionality of fat activism and feminism. Through her efforts, Freespirit played a crucial role in reshaping societal perceptions of fatness and advocating for the acceptance and dignity of all bodies.

Judy Freespirit's contributions to survivor advocacy, feminism, and support for the LGBTQ community were both significant and transformative. Freespirit boldly challenged the simplistic belief that childhood sexual abuse could be directly attributed as a cause of lesbianism. By doing so, she helped deconstruct harmful stereotypes and provided a more nuanced understanding of the complex relationship between trauma and sexual identity. By addressing these issues head-on, she contributed to a more nuanced understanding of how personal experiences shape one's identity. Judy Freespirit's contributions were groundbreaking in the fields of survivor advocacy, feminism, and LGBTQ support. Her explicit and unapologetic approach paved the way for a more inclusive and nuanced understanding of the complex relationships between trauma, sexuality, and identity. Her work continues to inspire and empower survivors and activists to this day. (This paragraph feels a little repetitive and has a less neutral tone. It's important to remain unbiased while writing your entry and not write as you would for an argumentative paper)

References[edit]

 * 1) ^
 * 2) ^
 * 3) ^
 * 4) ^
 * 5) ^ Jump up to:a b
 * 6) ^ Jump up to:a b
 * 7) ^ Jump up to:a b c d