User:Dresden Norris/Hugo Assmann/FeldronIberus Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Dresden Norris


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Dresden Norris/Hugo Assmann


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Hugo Assmann

Evaluate the drafted changes
Good rework of the original page. The added details and neutral tone really help paint a more complete and unbias picture of Hugo Assmann.

While I enjoy your prolific use of refined vocabulary, it is a bit out of place in this situation.

There are a few cases of duplication in this article. The phrases "alleviate the suffering of the global poor" and "During this period" are used twice. Might I suggest trying "help the poor" and "While he was there..." There is also a double usage of "throughout" in the last sentence of the Lead section. An alternative could be "...forced him to move between numerous Latin American countries throughout his life." The term "liberation theology" is hyperlinked twice. It should be a quick fix.

Quick question, when and how was Assmann ordained? The original article just states that he was. In the draft, it seems that he was ordained by earning his doctorate in theology.

The sentence mentioning Franz Hinkelammert could stand to be broken up. This would help continue the flow of the article.

Overall the article looks excellent, just some minor fixes, and it should be all good.