User:Dumplings4ever/Walkability initiatives in Barcelona/Ericcartman20 Peer Review

General info
Dumplings4ever
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Dumplings4ever/Walkability initiatives in Barcelona
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):

Evaluate the drafted changes
LEAD


 * The lead has some language that could be viewed as biased, I think the use of a lot of adjectives makes it seem more opinionated.


 * The introductory sentence is clear and concise and tells the reader exactly what the article will be discussing
 * the lead briefly touches on the content of the article but I think a little more could be added to give context to the body paragraphs

CONTENT


 * I like that there is contextual information about the history of Barcelona that helps the reader understand why these walkability initiatives are necessary today.
 * I think the language introducing the two studies done by U.S universities could be changed to be more logical. also it says "Two US universities" and then "Two United States universities" which makes it less cohesive so maybe choose 1 way to describe it and then change the other one to that way
 * Also those 2 paragraphs have very repetitive language so it could be helpful to combine them or change the wording

TONE AND BALANCE


 * There is not any obvious options in the article or underrepresented views but the language can at times be biased, especially in the lead and last paragraph.
 * the content itself is very neutral I just think the language can be changed to be more Wikipedia friendly

NEW ARTICLE / SOURCES


 * Not all sources are cited correctly


 * Many diverse sources which is good and meets Wikipedia's notability requirement


 * I think you could put a link to the wikipedia page on the LEED system so the reader and go there for more context on the initiative
 * I also think a link to the wiki page on Maslow's hierarchy of needs would be helpful to the reader.
 * All the headings and organization of the article make sense and make the article flow in a coherent way
 * the quality of the sources was also really good, they were trustworthy articles that I think really added to the page

OVERALL


 * overall the article is clear and concise and gets the point across in a way that is easy for the reader to understand.
 * I think a lot of the language can be changed to sound more neutral
 * the article is very interesting and informative on the subject matter