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The First Thanksgiving

The tradition of serving turkey for Thanksgiving dinner flies into the face of history. Actually, venison was the preferred entree’. The following is an account from the archives of the Weehawker Chronicles, Ted (Edward) Faulkner, Editor that pretends to put the matter straight.

Have you noticed that the portrayals of the First Thanksgiving show only Indian Braves? According to lore, the Indian Women remained in camp preparing dinner, awaiting the return of the men. No one knew whether the Pilgrims could even cook, but the Tribal Elders accepted the dinner invitation anyhow. Part way through the potato soup and mutton chops, Chief Sassacus sent his runner, QuicklyHawker, back to camp with instructions to prepare for dinner guests.

When Quickly delivered the chief’s message to Pocahantas, he added a post script of his own. “I was wondering if you…that is if I…perhaps if you and I might be seated together?”

“Be serious”, she replied. “I’m wondering how I’m going to shuck and boil another hundred ears of corn; I need a bigger pot, I need a bigger fire, and you are concerned about seating arrangements?”

When the guests started arriving, official greeter / translator BoHawker told them to feel free to use the brook to freshen up but, to kindly do so downstream of the village.

“We will all meet at sunset at the Well to hike back to Plymouth, so easy does it on the applejack,” she added. Foot Note: According to Padre Pea, a contributing editor, “I think that two different stories are mixed up here. Pocahantas was with the Powhatan Indians, in Virginia, and the Chief was her father. She is credited with saving John Smith’s life. The Massachusetts bunch were Wampanoags. Also, none of them knew they were Indians until they discovered Columbus. Chris called them ‘Indios’ because of bad geography”.

Reply: Another pseudo Connecticut Yankee, Sam Clemmons aka Mark Twain, is credited with having advised, “Don’t let the truth stand in the way of a good yarn”.