User:Ed.osterberger/Communication studies/EditsByDave Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Ed.osterberger


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Ed.osterberger/Communication_studies?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Communication studies

Evaluate the drafted changes
Great addition! I think it could use a couple extra sources, but what's written is solid. A couple edits I would suggest:


 * I think the last sentence of the first paragraph should be amended. I'm not sure what the purpose of indicating what "the focus should be", especially in contrast to any definitional claim (I'd imagine there's been some attempt to define business comm. studies?). I think, if I understand its purpose correctly, the sentence could be simplified to something such as "However, the American Assembly of Collegiate Schools of Business acknowledges that written and oral communication are both important elements of business communication studies, as recognized by most employers."
 * Not sure why the two paragraphs are separated. The intro sentence for the second paragraph seems similar to what the end of the first paragraph is getting at. Maybe consider combining? Or have a more decisive intro for second paragraph to differentiate it
 * I would change the tense of the last sentence, to something like "Application of modern business communication curriculums has enhanced the study of of business communication as a whole, and further prepared students to be able to effectively communicate in the business community."