User:Eggbert Pumpernickel

Eggbert Pumpernickel was born at the age of 0.

He quickly grew to become one of the most influential people in his field. Unfortunately his field only had a few trees and 3 sheep in it so soon he had to move on to greater things. This is when he discovered his first great love - cheese. Eggbert has been known to buy at least 4 cheeses a year from his local Asda; Often he would attempt to not pay for these by scanning them through the self service and putting a more expensive item on the scale. He is currently serving a nationwide ban for this.

When Eggbert was 14 years old he took a part time job working for the Post Office, nibbling the serrated edges on stamps. This is where he was first spotted by local scientific scouts and propelled him into national fame. Eggbert was 24 when he first published his theoretic paper "The Moon: No Thanks!" in which he made the controversial claim that humans as a race did not in fact need a moon and it would be better off for everyone if it just went back to where it came from. This in turn has caused several petitions both calling for Eggbert's arrest and/or knighthood - with one side stating that Eggbert is a moon racist and should learn to love all satellites equally and the other stating that we could do with lower sea levels anyway.

Eggbert was originally one of the founding members of The Beatles but due to a comedic set of mishaps kept dropping his drumstick when photos were taken meaning that he has never been captured in any of the bands original photos. Eggbert suffered bouts of laryngitis which often/always coincided with live/recorded shows so was unable to be captured on audio too. A fact he regrets to this day. This however did not stop him from moving on to help form The Rolling Stones only to suffer the same fate. Oh, and Oasis. He also once appeared as a crouton in a batchelor's soup advert, causing much controversy as he was claiming incapacity benefit at the time.

Recently Eggbert has taken time away from his scientific studies to spend time with his wife Suzie and their 9 year old Splodge. Eggbert likes long walks on the beach and short walks everywhere else.

Eggbert was recently named "Man of the year 2045" by Time Travel magazine.