User:ElainaM2456/Community management/RedHead102 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(provide username)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Hi Elaina,

Generally speaking, I think you did a good job with your first draft, particularly when it comes to incorporating the management focus of the class into what's being discussed in the article itself. Additionally, you've definitely made the article, in particular the lead section, much more complete.

In the second section entitled "Problems with Community Management," you state that "research has shown that Africans often don't prefer this management style" but then cite only one source for this. Considering this is a fairly grandiose claim, I would recommend citing one or two additional sources here. I think it would also be useful to expand the bullet points in this section, maybe add 2-3 more sentences for each one?

I noticed some minor grammatical errors as well (i.e. use of "if" instead of "is" in first sentence of third bullet point).