User:Elizacontreras2021/Pieskaret/Dbphu Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Elizacontreras2021


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Elizacontreras2021/Pieskaret
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Pieskaret

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Lead

I thought your lead was updated to appropriately reflect the new content that you added. I thought your introductory sentence was concise and quick in describing Pieskaret. However, I would have liked to have seen an estimated life span of Pieskaret included in the lead. I felt that your lead briefly touched or implied the major sections of your article. I did not think that your lead included any unnecessary information or information not present in the rest of the article. I thought your lead was fairly concise and I would have liked to have seen just a few more small details like Pieskaret's life span, when was he born and when did he die.

Content

I thought the added content was very relevant to the topic and greatly expanded upon the previous stub. I thought the added content was up to date but it would be easier to follow with proper citations to each source. I felt that most of the content was pretty thorough with nothing really missing but I am a little unsure about the stories of Pieskaret section and whether if it is necessary or needed to be included. The article does deal with one of Wikipedia's equity gap. It addresses a topic and individual of an underrepresented population

Tone and Balance

I thought the added content was relatively neutral, I thought how you presented the information was relatively neutral. Different people and groups describe Pieskaret in a biased way but you presented these opinion as neutral as possible. Overall I don't think the content really persuades the reader in one way or the other.

Sources and References

According to the bibliography, the new content is backed up by peer reviewed books and articles. I'm not entirely sure if your added content accurately reflects your sources as there were no citations to each reference in the sandbox. Make sure to cite your sources in your final draft.