User:Elsaskinner/Against Leptines/Wartracjunior Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Elsaskinner


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Elsaskinner/Against Leptines


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Against Leptines

Evaluate the drafted changes
From what has been changed in the article it is not very different as of yet. I see the importance of showing how big of an event it was so that is a good idea. What was added seemed interesting enough maybe just expand upon it a little bit more. Also it seems it is the same paragraph twice for half of it I assume this is on purpose just mentioning it.