User:Emmaschroder/School segregation in the United States/Corina.m.feist Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Emmaschroder


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Emmaschroder/School_segregation_in_the_United_States?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * School segregation in the United States

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hi Emma! Great job on your sandbox draft. Your links all worked well, and your sources are good. There is some clunky language in the new deal section of the page you may want to rework for flow. I always recommend pulling out any which, who, and that to make stronger sentences and cut out unnecessary fluff. Your information is accurate, and balanced, and relevant. You did an excellent job on your piece!