User:Espalding/International Women's Film Festival/SOPHIAH11 Peer Review

General info
Sofiagierthy, Donghk, Gatsbypup, Espalding
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Espalding/International Women's Film Festival
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):International Women's Film Festival

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

The lead of the article includes a lot of detail and describes a little bit of what each section of what they are writing is going to be about. It gives a lot of the quicker facts about the topic without going too much into anything, so it is good at presenting the information. The lead is also written in a manner in which the facts are stated, but it doesn't seem like they are bias in the information that is being provided. I also think that instead of having the sections in the lead, it could all be one paragraph that went over all of that information, or the history of both things could be a section separate from the lead. Because it is still a draft, there is a lot of presentation of information in the other sections that could be added to. The information that is cited is recent, but not all the information has a citation. But the article, so far, does not have any issues with bias information. I do, however, think that in some of the information about how women are excluded (like specifically) so that it doesn't seem as much like an establishment for a potential argument. I think the only sections that so far seem like they could be taking or pushing one side are the ones that are talking about history of exclusion and the lead, because there isn't a comparison between how women and men were treated or facts to state that the were excluded from x, etc. There are not a ton of referenced sources, but it is still an early draft. Overall, I think that it is good, and there is good information there that can be built off of.