User:Evanyende28

JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES

A man arrived a the gates of heaven. St Peter asked: 'Religion?' The man replied: 'Methodist.' St Peter looked down his list and said: 'Go to room 16, but be very quiet as you pass room 9.' Another man arrived at the gates of heaven. St Peter asked: 'Religion?' The man said: 'Baptist.' 'Ok,' said St Peter, 'Go to room 22, but be very quiet as you pass room 9.' A third man arrived at the gates. St Peter asked: 'Religion?' The man answered: 'Jewish.' 'Fine,' said St Peter. 'Go to room 14, but be very quiet as pass room 9.' The man said: 'I can understand there being different rooms for different religions, but why must I be quiet when I pass room 9?' St Peter said: 'The Jehovah's Witnesses are in room 9, and they think they're the only ones here.'

What do you get when you cross a skunk with a Jehovah's Witnesses? - A smell you can't get rid of.

A Jehovah's Witness was doing rounds, knocking door to door. Eventually an elderly woman invited him in for a cup of coffee. He was so shocked, he said: 'Are you sure?' 'Yes, yes, dear, come on in,' she insisted. 'I don't see many people these days. And although my sister's coming later, she won't be here until two o'clock, so that gives plenty of time for a nice chat. Now I want you to tell me all about the Jehovah's Witnesses.' 'I can't,' he sluttered. 'I've only been a Jehovah's Witness four years, and I've never got this far before!'

Two Jehovah's Witnesses were going door to door. At one house, the woman told them bluntly that she was not remotely interested in listening to their message. She slammed the door in their faces but, to her surprise, it bounched open again. Again and again, she ried to slam the door, but still it wouldn't shut. Angrily, she yelled: 'Will you get your blasted foot out of my door!' 'My foot isn't in your door,' said one of the Jehovah's Witnesses. 'But you might want to move your cat.'