User:Fatimas1937/Research on the effects of violence in mass media/KenG732 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Fatimas1937


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Research_on_the_effects_of_violence_in_mass_media&oldid=1020771733


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Research on the effects of violence in mass media

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

First of all you did a great job in providing the references for all the information that you've put down. and for your grammar I believe that you did a good job with that. I think my only complaint is that there is too much info coming from outside recources rather than putting them in your own words.

I've made a google docs with your edits in them and I have reviewed and put comments on them.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/14C3c7VMYyS45hnuAHNNUHDYYpOx6rNBN1VcPazwFaJk/edit?usp=sharing