User:Flanagan Institute Applicant/Digital obsolescence/Serialsgirl Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Flanagan Institute Applicant


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Flanagan%20Institute%20Applicant/Digital_obsolescence?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Digital obsolescence

Evaluate the drafted changes
Article is looking great so far. The content is relevant and the sources are a good mix of current and historical professional literature, which makes sense for this topic. Will the picture of the Domesday machine be an additional image to the one in the article or a replacement? I think they are both great images but prefer your caption. The tone of the piece reads neutral.

Lead

I think the new lead for this article reads much better and gives a good overview of the topic.

Background

This is a good addition to the article. I think having some background on the topic before getting into the examples will help users.

Examples of Digital Obsolescence

Good mini lead for this section.

Hardware

Wording is good, it should integrate into the original Hardware Obsolescence section nicely.

Software

Paragraph one: Typo in sentence one - replaces should be replaced. Typo between sentences two and three, need a space between the period and "One." Sentence three would benefit from rewriting. Might be a good idea to read it aloud or drop it into Word and have it read by the computer to see what sounds better.

Paragraphs two and three-would also listen to these being read, some words seem like they are plural and should not be, or vice versa.

Again, I think this section will be a great addition to the main article.

Prevention strategies

Good renaming of this section. More great content to merge with what exists.

See also

Good additions for the list

External Links

Nice to have these separated out for users to find quickly.

Your article improvements are going to be valuable for users. Good luck with the rest of the project!