User:Flyinghighdragon

Kris Farren the legend of Mynydd Isa

A local resident of a small village called Mynydd Isa, located in the North Wales county of Flintshire. A man most people describe as an absolute bellend. Some use more colourful language. Nevertheless, this mid 40’s male is a character and a half. A self proclaimed high standard amateur footballer and skilled electrician, Kris leads a very busy life doing lots of things that don’t involve his kids or wife who seems to have the patience of a saint. His lively and socially active status adds to the legacy he has created over the years. He is the first to admit that one of his greatest strengths is the ability to clear a room full of people when he breaks wind. The eye watering gases that his diet of Sausage chips and Turkey dinosaurs produces has been known to make children cry and suffer from nightmares. Some say that one of his putrid farts once killed a neighbours cat. Another extraordinary bodily function this man is proud to consider a talent is spontaneous urination. Predominantly when he’s in bed after copious amounts of alcohol, but it has been witnesses during the occasional social situation whilst being fully clothed