User:Forre179/Misogynoir/Amanda Totz Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Forre179


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Forre179/Misogynoir?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Misogynoir

Evaluate the drafted changes
Draft not found in sandbox by editor (Nov. 27, 2022). Is there somewhere else this draft may be posted?

The draft still isn't in the sandbox when I went to look again for peer review (Dec. 4, 2022).

(Dec. 5, 2022)

Wow! This draft looks so impressive and is so well written. Nice job!

Lead:

There doesn't seem to be any new additions to the lead or opening section when compared to the original article, however the original article did have a rather strong introduction and so I feel as though editing that may not have been super necessary.

Content:

The added content in this section looks so impressive. The additional information to the article really helps give the readers much more information needed to fully grasp what the original article is talking about. The added information really added a lot in terms of introducing some of those missing pieces the original article was lacking. What is lacking from this section however is information regarding how you are going to implement this into the new article. I could be confused on my end, but are you going to be adding this somewhere within the original article or are you revamping the entire article completely and having your draft be the new format? (hopefully that made sense!)

Tone and Balance:

Really neutral tone, no negative persuading happening within the writing.

Sources and References:

The additional sources you added really look amazing. The number of sources you added, as well as the quality of sources are really impressive and add to the validity of the article.

Organization:

Your draft is super well organized, however like I said before it would be beneficial I think if you highlighted or explained a bit more where this is going to fit into the original article in terms of organization. All of the material you wrote about works really well with the article, however I don't have any information regarding where you are going to be putting this new information into the original article.

Images and Media:

No new pictures or media. I think that adding at least one new picture when talking about hip hop could be a really cool addition to the original article! Hip hop I think is a relatively lively style of music and I think there are some great opportunities to utilize pictures and color, especially when you mentioned how it was a popular way for black individuals to express themselves throughout history.

Overall Impressions:

The amount of work you have put into this article is evident and the information you have added is very impressive! Your group should feel proud of all the hard work you have put in over the semester!