User:Fossil Fuels/FedEx/Dscsd21 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Fossil Fuels


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * (see below)
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * FedEx

Evaluate the drafted changes
Fossil Fuel's additions to the FedEx article were one hundred percent on topic with the "Environmental practices and initiative" section in which it was present. This edit does a fine job expressing the future sustainability goals of FedEx through the use of reliable sources, like the Security and Exchange Commission website. This addition builds well off of the original statement of FedEx's carbon emissions goal, as well as the company's financial sustainability initiatives. The addition doesn't display any apparent biases, nor do any points appear to be over/understated. All present links work properly, and are adequately sourced in terms of scholarly/governmental sourcing. The only things that stood out as potentially distracting were the wording of the first and last sentences of the "Success of Current Environmental Practices" section. In the first sentence, saying that FedEx avoids "several amounts of emissions" is a bit wordy and unclear. Finally, the last sentence states that the company avoids two tons of carbon dioxide, when it might be beneficial to add that they avoided producing that carbon dioxide. There is also potential to add a more in-depth analysis of why FedEx might not reach their carbon goal, rather than limiting the reasoning to the inability to execute business operations as planned. Overall this addition was well written and on topic, ultimately making this a better article than before Fossil Fuel's additions.