User:FranklinLu/Sexual repression/Ezacarias01 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Franklin Lu


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:FranklinLu/Sexual_repression?preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Sexual repression

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

In Research Findings you used the same citation 3 times. I think you can try paraphrasing the entire paragraph more and then adding the citation at the end since all of that information comes from the same source. You could repeat the same from Sexual Revolution under China (at least for the first paragraph), Japan, and Russia.

The content under Russia almost seems like a summary for the cited article. Maybe you can paraphrase a bit more to condense the information. Also, perhaps consider finding other sources to add into the paragraph.

Other than that, the writing is good in terms of grammar and structure. Nice job!