User:G9m9brown/Theybie

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Growing popularity through the internet
Much of the rapid growth in popularity of gender-neutral parenting and theybies can be credited to the power of the internet. Parents of non-heterosexual children have been sharing their experiences through online blogs or other forms of social media to increase awareness about childhood gender nonconformity. When a new parent goes to the internet for advice on how to curb gender nonconformity in their children, they have increasingly been met with advice and educational resources on why it is not something to fear or discourage.

The increased visibility for and sharing of ways to combat gender stereotypes in parenting that the internet has enabled has also led to parents taking action to encourage a real-world shift in cultural attitudes. In some cases, school policies have been rewritten due to parental collective action (facilitated and amplified on the internet) to rid them of gendered stereotypes and discrimination, as well as to implement gender-inclusive training for staff. By being vocal and initiating discourse about gender neutrality in their own online social circles, parents have begun to change the attitude of the parenting community as a whole to be less critical towards challenging the gender binary.

In many modern (mainly Western) civilizations, a gender binary exists and is generally enforced from birth. In recent years, there has been increasing scrutiny of gendered socialization in parenting communities, with some questioning the extent to which the gender binary is innate versus just being the only option presented. Parents of theybies' motivations for choosing to raise their child this way include ''supporting gender diversity, improving self-determination of gender, reducing sexism, and reducing the developmental effects of gender stereotypes on children. '' Additionally, many assert that "what their child has 'between their legs'" is not relevant to their gender presentation and is, simply, "nobody's business".

Many parents of children who are LGBT subscribe to a "born this way" view on sexual orientation and gender identity, contrasting the belief that parenting choices can "make" children non-heterosexual. This argument has been echoed by parents who practice gender-neutral parenting, they use this view to emphasize their children may or may not necessarily identify as LGBT when they are old enough to decide on their own who they are, as they believe identity is innate and not changed by their upbringing.

The varying degrees to which parents attempt to reduce the effects of gendered socialization can depend on how hostile their community is when confronted with those who choose to parent outside the gender binary. LGBT parents report higher levels of anxiety when making the decision to raise their child as a theybie or to allow them to explore gender from a young age. This is due to the higher scrutiny these parents face from critics who believe that being raised by two parents who are the same gender will "make" a child gay. These parents have also acknowledged that in some situations they even go against their personal beliefs about gender-neutrality for their children or are inconsistent with their resistance of stereotypes due to their feeling of higher scrutinization.

Associated Parenting Style
Aside from not disclosing their child’s biological sex at birth (the most literal practice of raising a theybie), there are a variety of approaches of differing severity that parents have adopted when introducing gender neutrality into their parenting. The majority of parents who have shared their experiences with gender-neutral parenting or raising a theybie report that they believe in a child-centered approach to parenting. This approach focuses on the uniqueness of every child and their different needs.

One of the most common ways gender-neutral parenting has been practiced is through varying children's toy options. The vast majority of children's toys are strictly separated by gender, with different skills being prioritized between the two. Toys marketed as "for girls" tend to focus on encouraging domesticity, vanity, and general emotional awareness. Alternatively, toys "for boys" most often focus on increasing spatial reasoning skills, encouraging physicality, and normalizing aggression. By encouraging only specific skillsets for each gender, they both end up having gaps in life skills that make their options later in life more limited. This has contributed to the current societal norm of men working and generally being in positions of more power, and women taking care of their children and handling domestic duties. To combat these gaps, parents have started offering their children some toy options that are gender-neutral and some toys geared towards each gender, all framed as equally preferable choices. This variety of options is often offered in other important aspects of childhood development such as clothing and extracurricular activities.

Legal recognition
In the United States, multiple states have passed legislation allowing for gender neutral identifiers on birth certificates in recent years.

States that currently allow a gender-neutral sex marker on birth certificates:


 * ß.Gender neutral designation permitted at birth
 * ±.Court order required to initiate change
 * ʊ.Requires some documentation of treatment clinically appropriate for the purpose of gender transition (surgery is not required)