User:Gbalic/Gertrude Kerbis/Almondblossoms1890 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Gbalic


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Gbalic/Gertrude Kerbis


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Gertrude Kerbis

Evaluate the drafted changes
Lead:

The proposed lead is strong and provides more information than the current live article. I would consider rephrasing "Her work entails that interior design can also be viewed as architecture and not just the aesthetic of a space", this comes across almost as an opinion of what her work represents. I would find a more neutral way to state this, or make it clear that some people hold this opinion, instead of representing it as a fact.

Life and Education:

Strong, with relevant information. I would consider changing that she received her "BS" and specify the exact degree she received. You could also consider filing the relevant information about her personal life under it's own section instead of combining it with information about her education.

Career:

There is an error under employment; it's written " She also taught Harper Community College in Palatine, IL for 25 years" Assuming it's meant to be "She taught at Harper Community College."

Design Style:

It's written "Some of her most successful implementations of this modern style " I would consider rephrasing this to take on a more neutral tone. It's unclear whether or not you are establishing that it was a financial success or if, in general opinion, these implementations are considered to be effective. What someone considers to be a success in terms of design is very subjective and opinion based.

General Feedback:

Overall well written and articulated. The information is presented in a very succinct way. I would consider some phrasing changes to keep a neutral tone, and would consider adding some images that correspond with some of the information presented in the article.