User:Gf6f3/Sugar baby/Karleeseek Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(provide username)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
Holy references! There sure are a lot of them for such a short article, I feel like half the visual page is taken up by them. If there's any way to cut back before adding in new and more relevant information, that would be beneficial!

The lead isn't my favorite, because it does lean into the economic benefits of sugar babies. But as we know with Ambiguous Entanglements, sugaring could come in many shapes and forms. I think this section could benefit from a direct line about the power differential between a sugar parent and baby, no matter economic/material benefit.

The first sentence of prevalence reads like the lead to a journalism article to me. It doesn't feel as informational as it does biased. Over all the tone feels very geared towards a younger audience, but that's not very inclusive of the actual demographic. While there is a clientele for sugaring among academia, there lies a significant portion of people who do this well outside the realm of college. Also without naming information, the dating app info isn't very relevant.

It would be interesting to see possibly a section on social impact of sugaring! Or being a sugar baby! Or possibly definitions of it and how it's changed through time. Over all, this article is missing a lot of interesting items! You all could add a lot and I'm super interested to see!