User:Greg L/"Fuck” is not necessarily uncivil

Most reasonable-minded, experienced wikipedians over the age of 16 (and who don’t slink around behind the woodshop at school to sneak a smoke) appreciate that if one resorts to the F-word in a post, they’ve probably already lost their argument before they started. Routine use of the word can make editors appear to be the type, than when they recite a bedtime fairytale from memory to their children, instead of beginning with “Once upon a time…”, they begin with “Ya’ll ain’t gonna believe this shit…”.

Moreover, Wikipedia’s admins are held to a higher, exemplary (look up the definition) standard of conduct than the mere-mortal editors who deal with each other in the collaborative writing environment that is Wikipedia.

“Fuck” is one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English Language today. When “fuck” is being used as a simple intensive, as in the series “durned,” “darned,” “blasted,” “bloody,” “damned,” “frigin,” “f**king,”, and “fucking,” and isn’t being used to cast aspersions upon another, there isn’t much harm. The use of intensives in writing can be even more important than when engaged in face-to-face speech because intensives can so efficiently signal one’s mood, degree of frustration, and/or emphasis of a particular aspect when the receiving party can neither hear intonations nor see facial expressions.

But “fuck” is more than a simple intensive; it is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love and hate. In language, “fuck” falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive: “Wally fucked Thorn,” and intransitive: “Thorn was fucked by Wally.” It can be a noun: “Wally is a dumb fuck,” or an adjective: “That fucking Wally,” or an adverb: “Wally is fucking interested in putting us out of business.” As you can see, there are very few words with the versatility of “fuck”.

Besides its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations:


 * Greetings: “How the fuck are you?”
 * Fraud: “I got fucked by the Portuguese fishflogger.”
 * Dismay: “Oh fuck it!”
 * Trouble: “Well… I guess I’m fucked now.”
 * Frustration: “Fuck me!”
 * Confusion: “What the fuck??”
 * Difficulty: “I don’t understand this fucking business.”
 * Despair: “Fucked again.”
 * Incompetence: “Wally fucks up everything.”
 * Displeasure: “What the fuck is going on here?”
 * Lost: “Where the fuck are we?”
 * Disbelief: “Unfuckingbelievable.”
 * Retaliation: “Up your fucking nose.”
 * Descriptive: “This whole process has been such a cluster-fuck.”
 * Indifference: “I don't give a flying fuck.”


 * It can be used in an anatomical description: “Wally is a fucking asshole.” (In this case, the use of “fucking” here on Wikipedia would be the simple intensive, which is permissible, IMO. However, the “asshole” would be the impermissible part and would constitute a personal attack on Wally.)
 * It can be used to tell time: “It’s five-fucking-thirty already?” (Civil)
 * It can be used in business: “Wally has fucked us over.” (Civil, unless Wally didn’t fuck anyone over; in which case, it would be an accusatory lie and that would be uncivil.)
 * Or this alternative constuction: “Thorn was fucked over by Wally.” (As above. However the use of passive voice might get you a lifetime ban from Wikipedia and an anonymous phone call to your employer alleging you screw goats.)
 * It can be maternal: “Wally is a motherfucker.” (What Wally does in private off of Wikipedia is just that: private. Decidedly uncivil.)
 * It can be dismissive: “Fuck Wally.” (Civil, unless Theresa is saying it to Wally in person, in which case it is very civil. Normally this phrase best translates to “Forget Wally and move on.”)
 * It can be extra dismissive: “Fuck you.” (Decidedly uncivil. This phrase best translates to “I defy you and all you represent as I stand with clenched fist.” It is arguably a personal attack.)
 * It can be judgmental: “Fuck your idea.” ( Much better. This best translates on Wikipedia to “I find your suggestion to be a metric ton of Iraniancentrifuged, weaponsgrade bullonium that leaves me  exceedingly  unimpressed.” If you are still in primary or secondary school and are accustomed to teachers giving you an “A for effort” even when you turn in a real stinker for homework, welcome to the real world. Here, people aren’t paid to inflate Dick’s or Jane’s self-esteem and there is no politically correct requirement for others to admire your suggestions and ideas as much as you do.)

Remember, the word “fuck” is memorialized in history in association with our greatest struggles and disasters:
 * General McAuliffe, when faced with the German demand for surrender, didn’t really say “Nuts”, he said “Awe… fuck that shit!”
 * Let us never forget General Custer’s last words as he ratcheted his head left & right: “Where did all these fucking Indians come from?!?”
 * Also the famous last words of the Mayor of Hiroshima: “What the fuck was  that  !??”
 * And, last but not least, the immortal words of the captain of the Titanic, who pondered “Where is all this fucking water coming from???”
 * Note, however that there is historical controversy on this last one. For another departing passenger from the Titanic overheard Capt. Smith, standing there in his boxers, exclaim “What! I thought  you  were steering the fucking boat!”

Finally, I’d like to make a proposal. Personally, for those times when you need of an strong intensive, I would suggest the use of “bloody” on Wikipedia, as in “That’s bloody rubbish.” Doing so carries the advantage of diverting other editors, who will spend time going to your user page in a vain attempt to discern whether or not you hail from England and  really are  some sort of smart dude. This will give you more time to compose your next post with less risk of an edit conflict.

To those who might strenuously disagree with me, just remember to properly address me. That’s “Mister Fuckhead” to you.

Thank you for your attention.Disclaimer