User:GuyNamedSid

Once upon a time there was a young boy named Guy. Guy was 23 years old and lived in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. While walking home from school one day, a Green Wolf jumped out from behind a A big ass TV and tackled Guy to the ground. But just when he was about to let out a scream for help, Guy realized that the Green Wolf was only licking his face, not trying to bite it off. At that moment, Guy decided to keep the Green Wolf as a pet. And on the way home he decided to name his pet Green Wolf Ash. When Guy and his new pet finally got home, guess who was standing on the front porch? That's right, it was Guy's mother, Deborah. And boy was she surprised to see a Green Wolf following Guy into the yard! What in world is that? shouted Deborah. It's a Green Wolf, answered Guy. Dah, I can see that, Guy, but what on earth is it doing here? said Deborah. It's my new pet! answered Guy. Oh you think so do you? remarked Deborah. ''I wouldn't get your hopes up. You know how your father hates Green Wolfs. But, well, I suppose you can keep him until your father comes home.'' And with that Guy grabbed Ash by the scruff of the neck and led his new pet into the house--even though he knew his father was probably going to dissaprove. Once in the house, Guy and Ash played and played, that is until Guy's favorite television show, LOST, started. At that point Guy forgot all about Ash having an unsupervised run of the house. That is until half way through LOST, when Guy was brought back to reality when he heard his father shout, ''Fuck!! Guy! Get your Ass in the livingroom...NOW!!'' With that Guy rushed into the livingroom to see what all the fuss was about. When he entered the livingroom, there stood his father, Edward, pointing toward the couch. Will someone please explain that? asked his father. Then, as Guy followed his father's finger to where it was pointing, he instantly knew what his father was so upset about. There, smack dab in the middle of the couch, was the biggest pile of Wolf doo-doo he had ever seen! I don't EVEN want to know how that got there, said Edward. ''But you had better get it cleaned up now! And you had better get rid of whatever it is that could have done such a thing!'' Well, knowing his father as well as he did, Guy knew there was no sense even asking his father if he could keep Ash for a pet. So without hesitation, Guy set out to find where Ash was hiding. After a few minutes of looking, Guy discovered Ash crouched beneath the table that Guy did his Music on. ''Come on, Ash, it's time to find you a new home. And hey, don't look at me that way, I'm not the one who did the dirty deed on the couch!'' scolded Guy. ''Thanks to you I'll never get to have my own pet Wolf!! And with that Guy led Ash out of the house and down to the local AmericanEagle. They had a pet section and Guy knew the owner would find Ash a good home. So after saying good-bye to Ash, and thanking the owner of AmericanEagle, Guy walked backed home and attempted to dround his sorrows by slamming down a half dozen Iced teas. But Guy's pitty party came to an abrupt end when his father reminded him about the mess he had neglected to clean up. And low and behold, midway through the clean-up, Guy suddenly became thankful that someone else was going to have to do it from now on. The End.