User:Hartleln/sandbox

About: The Disney ride at Disneyland in Magic Kingdom
My evaluation: The article is written from the point of view of a fan. There are parts of the article where you can hear the excitement and love for the ride in the words the person wrote. The sentences get longer and start to run as if a person was excitedly talking about the ride, especially in the section titled "Disney." This creates a bias for the article and Wikipedia wants that articles to remain neutral. There is also a very long and detailed description of the ride that might interest some people but not everyone because it could take the fun out of the ride if the reader had not been on it before. Also that description focuses on the one at Magic Kingdom and does not have much on the other theme park ones. There is also a small section on the rides that are similar. While this is interesting it the article is about the Haunted Mansion ride not the other rides, a link would be better. The organization does make since because it goes in order of development, debut, and updates. It then goes into detail about the ride and the ride at other locations. It is written in third person which is good. There are parts that need more citations, the description of the ride relies heavily on the author's experience and memory.

One person thought that the description was also too detailed and should be shortened. Another noticed that there seems to be two history sections and that the dates do not always match. The descriptions confused other people on the talk page. One person mentioned that it is just "Haunted Mansion" and does not contain the word "the." The description being shortened and changed is what I found to be the biggest problem and seems to match the majority of the people.

*** My comment was made on the page under the title "Description"

10/8 Homework Assignment
The articles main problem is that it needs to be verified more in the information written. There is not enough evidence that is being provided.

On the talk page, there are a few technical errors, like the naming of food or locations. There was a request to give more detail about the locations of the other skylines in other states. There was also a mistake on the ingredients of the chili.

Topics to add:


 * 1) Who can ride?
 * 2) requirements

Fact check these articles:


 * 1) http://mentalfloss.com/article/58272/13-facts-about-disneys-haunted-mansion
 * 2) https://d23.com/from-the-magic-kingdom-to-the-movies-13-fun-facts-about-the-haunted-mansion/
 * 3) http://www.doombuggies.com/history3.php
 * 4) http://passport2dreams.blogspot.com/2013/01/riding-haunted-screen.html

https://www.tokyodisneyresort.jp/en/tdl/attraction/detail/171/

https://disneyworld.disney.go.com/attractions/magic-kingdom/haunted-mansion/

https://disneyland.disney.go.com/attractions/disneyland/haunted-mansion/

Blog Posts
10/8

For this assignment I have decided to the article I found on, “The Haunted Mansion.”  This article is on the ride, not the movie. The article was given a c-class rating because of its lack of verifiable information. There is also a detailed description of the one at Disneyland in Florida. This causes a problem for many of the people on the talk page. The description does not have sources connected to it, just the experience of the writer. I plan to edit that and take a lot of it away. I would also like to focus more on actual facts about the ride and not the experience. Also, I plan to add more to the other location paragraphs of the ride. I think the biggest obstacle for me would be finding credible information about the topic. I also think it might be challenging for me to write in a neutral tone because I do enjoy the ride and movie. I am currently thinking of different topics or subtopics to add besides the three different locations. I am looking forward to learning the history and random facts of this ride.

10/22

I am sticking with my Haunted Mansion article about the Disney ride. Having done some research there is a lot of articles pushed about the ride. Most of which would not be considered the most credible. However, I have looked at the UC library articles and found some there. After my meeting with Dr. Hammond we decided to broaden the search to include "dark rides." That way there can be more examples and research I can use. I have been able to find articles about these rides that will hopefully aid me in editing the "Related attractions" topic. As far as my progress I am still in the research phase and will hopefully move past that soon.

Good Sentences to Keep from Disneyland Heading
Entering the queuing area through a pair of ornate gates, guests find themselves in the antebellum-era mansion's well-tended gardens and courtyards. A mausoleum with pun names, a cemetery at the top whose tombstones bear the names of the Imagineers who created this attraction, and a white carriage hearse led by an invisible horse which occasionally nickers. Stepping onto the porch, guests are admitted inside the mansion through a doorway on the far right of the house into the Foyer, lit by a large, flickering, cobweb-covered chandelier and surrounding candelabras.

In the Foyer, the deep, resonant voice of an invisible spirit (Paul Frees) sets the tone of the attraction with a short opening monologue, accompanied by a funeral dirge variation of Grim Grinning Ghosts.

While on the Doom Buggies guests can see the Hatbox Ghost in the dark night to over look the Graveyard below.

A ghostly band of minstrels plays a jazzy rendition of "Grim Grinning Ghosts" as a family of cats and two owls join in harmony.

The ride incorporates an Egyptian mummy and a "wise old man" from the Renaissance period can both be seen.

Sticking true to the character the Doom Buggies pass a group of three ghosts thumbing for a ride.

For more culture aspects the riders can witness ghosts waltzing to a discordant version of the attraction's theme song played on a pipe organ (Captain Nemo's organ set piece from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea).

DELET THE REST

Disneyland
The Disneyland version is a slow-moving ride with dark, loud, and scary portions. There is no height requirement and can be enjoyed by all ages.

For more culture aspects the riders can witness waltzing to a discordant version of the attraction's theme song played on a pipe organ (Captain Nemo's organ set piece from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea)[2]

While on the Doom Buggies drift out of an Attic window and onto the balcony, coming face to face with can see the Hatbox Ghost amidst a starry night sky filled with wispy spirits rising from the in the dark night to overlook the Graveyard below.

The ride incorporates an Egyptian mummy sits up in his sarcophagus, holding a cup of tea and singing along, while and the ghost of a "wise old man" from the Renaissance period.

Sticking true to the characters the Doom Buggies pass a group of three ghosts thumbing for a ride.

Magic Kingdom
The Magic Kingdom version does not require a height and is recommended for all ages. It is a slow ride with dark portions. The ride includes a spirited Doom Buggy tour and a spooky interactive queque.

Tokyo
Tokyo Haunted Mansion contains 999 ghostly inhabitants and guests can go on the ride when it rains. The ride includes loud noises and darkness at some parts.