User:HeatherSchimming/William Augustus Bowles/Wsprad74 Peer Review

General info
HeatherSchimming
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:HeatherSchimming/William Augustus Bowles
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * William Augustus Bowles

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hello Heather! Here's my peer review for your Wikipedia Draft,

Lead:

Has the Lead been updated to reflect the new content added by your peer? Comparing your draft and the current article about William Augustus Bowles I can definitely say that you didn't change much in this part of the article, but that is because the Lead was already concise and informative so there wasn't much that needed changing.

Content/Sources and References:

You have moved around some of the already written text in the article to provide more clarity and to give the reader a better understanding of the context which I really like. You have also added more section headers that you have expanded upon and designated new portions of the article to, which the old article desperately needed.

I saw that you added a couple of headings such as "1791 Arrest and Deportation" and "Bowles' Proclamation of War" which don't have much content in them at the moment. Thats perfectly fine! Those headings seem to be about major parts of Bowles' life and definitely need to be mentioned. Just make sure to include some primary and secondary sources to do so.

You have also added new footnotes to the text that ties in some references which is awesome, although in your draft I see that you don't have a specific "references" section, but I'm sure you can clean that up for the final draft.

Tone/Organization:

I think the tone and organization of this article is one of your strongest aspects as a whole. Your tone is neutral and the organization throughout the article makes it easy to read.

Additional Questions:

In the "Early Life" section the beginning touches on the early life of William Augustus Bowles, but when you keep reading that section it starts to talk more broadly about Bowles' overall life and how he was remembered, my question is are you going to clean that section up and take out the parts that aren't specifically about his "Early Life" or are you going to change the heading title entirely?

-William Spradling