User:Helen.douglass/sandbox

Zach Meduna was born in Illinois just like his sidekick James Janis. Zach is a child prodigy who is perfect in just about every aspect of his life: math is one of his strongest, chemistry, biology, physics, an amazing clarinet player to top it all off. At just Zach decided at just 6 months old that Illinois just wasn't for him, so he packed up his family and moved to the plains of North Dakota. Finally after a long decisions Zach decided to settle his family in Bismarck, North Dakota.

He had a pretty much uneventful elementary and middle school but during high school, Zach met a lover, Mikayla. Sadly, the relationship didn't last long because Mikayla met the love of her life, Dallas. Zach was heartbroken, destroyed if you will. No matter how hard he tried Zach just could not move on. Zach then focused on his "school work." This actually meant hanging out with 5 girls at a time to numb the pain. They loved to eat at "Sickies", a famous all-everything burger joint, for hours at a time. Eventually, one girl became Zach's "forever" girl. This girl is Michelle Obama. Michelle Obama and Zach spent many hours together going over the governments flaws and solutions. This is low-key how Obama saved America.

After high school Zach decided to attend the University of North Dakota for chemical engineering. Zach has received numerous scholarships from UND. He stated how he received a "small" scholarship of $16,000. Whilst at University of North Dakota, he served as a dad to several children. These children all live with dad. Zach Meduna is a man that has a huge impact on those around him. Zach has made one mistake, however. Getting back together with Mikayla for a short period of time. This lead to a disruption on the floor. People were outraged. Mikayla breaks Zach's trust and meets a new boy named Cole. Zach yet again falls into despair. Cole is a football star at a local community college. Cole is supposedly going to transfer to SDSU in order to be closer to Mikayla. Mikayla is beyond excited.

During this time of sadness and remorse Zach begins to bond with James. They found they have much in common, they talked about their times at Sickies. Mysteriously, James always returns sweaty and states how he went to "Sams Club" after Sickies. How suspicious. The girls on the floor knew James for something, that he's rocking down under, if you catch my drift. (butt crack drift). James unfortunately suffer from Long Ass Crack Syndrome. What really gets the girls for James is the minivan. The term shagging wagon gets thrown around, but this is really the definition of it. Thank God for seats that can be put down for more room. This is horrifying but completely accurate. Apart from all of this, James and Zach's friendship will stay forever strong. no matter how far apart they may live, and their bond will never diminish.

A wild Mikayla then appears yet again. Zach screams in horror. Windows break and a storm's a brewing. A tornado ruptures in the Brannon building where Zach and his many floor children reside. His life is ruined. Good thing he still has his children to pay for his medical bills and take care of his injuries. Zach is almost dead but keeps trucking. Than James appears with a sorority girl and takes her into his room and the door shuts and no one hears from them for hours. The girl then emerges stating that was the greatest night of her life. She'll be back for more from big boy.

James, however, realizes his mistake and becomes a catholic. He begs Jesus Christ for acceptance. Jesus, however was not the answer. James then goes down to Alpha Phi and returns with 4 girls this time. The girls let James join their sorority, which breaks all sorority rules. James becomes president and begins his own sorority: James Phi Omega. Back to Zach, our main topic, he decided he can't live his life alone any longer. He must find the one. This one is Ian.

Ian becomes stepmother to all of Zach's wonderful children. Ian however is not who everyone thought he was. Ian comes out as a nun. He loves Mother Theresa, almost more than Zach. But, Ian has bigger priorities at the moment. Ian is pregnant, with not Zach's baby!! what a tragedy! Bethany is the father but is also Zach's child. The scandal has really begun now. This scandal has never caused such an uproar. Ian may be from Texas but he's never been more North Dakotan in his life. Ian decides North Dakota isn't for him and returns to Texas and becomes a police stripper. Ian is high in demand because of his Jewish background and is highly regarded in the community. In the end, Zach lives out the remainder of his wild life in Puerto Rico with all the Spanish ladies. As-Salaam-Allikum!