User:Henry Doejaaren/sandbox

Will Shuck is the most popular man in America. He stands at 6’9” 420 pounds and drives a Volkswagen Golf. His most recent achievement was graduating from Yale at only 16 years of age. Will had an abnormal upbringing. He was not raised by his parents. He was raised by the most famous short man of all time, Danny Devito. Danny raised Will to be a professional dolphin, but Will decided on be becoming a basketball player. This dream of being a basketball player caused him to practice everyday with Larry Bird. His practice has paid off and he is now a 5 star recruit in the class of 2020. He will be playing at Duke in the fall of 2020 as a power forward.

It was around the age of 11 that Will realized that he did not have legs. Will has overcome this by learning how to float. Will said in an interview on Fox,”What I lack in legs, I make up for with enormous ears.” This did not many sense and is still being deciphered 2 years later. A major road block in Will’s life was his addiction to smelling his own long blonde locks. It became so serious that he had to get his hair permanently removed. This was not entirely a disadvantage. Because his head is so shiny and bald, it acts as a powerful solar panel. In fact, he actually powered the entire city of Charlotte with his powerful baldness.

Although his time with his guardian Danny Devito will be coming to an end, he is excited to see where his masterful basketball skill will take him. Rumors say that he will also be running for president of Pakistan in 2024, so he may even be leaving America soon. Will Shuck is the most interesting man in the world and will always be.