User:Houdarar13/Fervo Energy/BornAYasMain Peer Review

General info
(Houdarar13)
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Houdarar13/Fervo_Energy?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template:
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * N/A

Evaluate the drafted changes
Clarity:

- In the 'Background Idea' paragraph I saw something that I think could be worded differently to match the statement made by the author of the article you linked. You said that the reliance on foreign imports continued the 'feeling of hesitancy in American markets' but when checking the reference, they said that it created a unstable situation for the American economy because foreign countries may not have similar interests as America. I think the idea was correct but maybe the choice of words could be changed to match the statement. I don't mean to be nitpicky but I just was a bit confused.

- In the 'EGS Application' paragraph, there is information about what has happened to EGS, yet there is no information that actually states what it is. Unless EGS is the 'shale fracking methodologies' mentioned in the beginning of the paragraph, it may be a good idea to mention it in the beginning of it. Not knowing clearly what EGS is makes it hard to understand the rest of the paragraph.

Structure:

- Some of the paragraphs are hard to understand for people (like myself) who have little to no knowledge on certain topics. For example in the 'EGS Application paragraph', when talking about the issues surrounding EGS (particularly talking about the paragraph talking about the zone isolation of fracturing issues + the one below it), not knowing what EGS really is in the first place, and the paragraphs of information with 1 to 2 sources + no intext citations, make it hard to grasp the point of the paragraphs, and their significance.

- Moving the 'Comparable Plants' paragraph below the 'EGS Application' paragraph could be a nice touch because it talks about a competitor to the company, and the amount of energy they produce. It could be written in a 'compare and contrast' manner to make it flow with the article location.

- The paragraphs are mostly written in a well balanced structure and chronological where they can be. For example the 'Drilling Demonstration' paragraph talks about something Fervo Energy did in July 2023, and the following 'Cape Station Project' paragraph follows it, which mentions a ceremony held by the company in September 2023.

Balanced Coverage:

- Most of the paragraphs have decently fitted paragraph sizes, but a few of them could be slightly longer to fit the flow of the article. For example, the 'EGS Application' paragraph is hefty in size, but the preceding paragraph on 'Background Idea' and the 'Lead' paragraph are a lot short in length. Granted they may not have as much information about them as the EGS application paragraph, yet at least for the Lead paragraph, there must be some other information on the company that can be added which can add some size to the paragraph.

- It was good to add the paragraph on 'Comparable Plants' in the article because not only does the article talk about Fervo Energy and who they are, but it adds the element of knowing what other companies like Fervo Energy are, and how they compare to the company being written about.

Neutrality:

- I think most of the article was neutral, however I saw one instance in the 'Background Idea' paragraph that I thought may not have been neutral in nature. You said that the reliance on foreign imports continued the 'feeling of hesitancy in American markets' but when checking the reference, they said that it created a unstable situation for the American economy because foreign countries may not have similar interests as America. I think the idea was correct but maybe the choice of words could be changed to match the statement.

- To add to that point, because the source to those claims were written by an American journalist, it creates a sense of bias to the claims as it is derived from the American point of view. As Wikipedia can be seen by people around the world, some improvement to this neutrality aspect can be improved somehow.

Sources:

- I think adding a few intext citations to other Wikipedia articles could be a good addition to the article. For example, adding wiki links to 'hydraulic fracturing' and 'fracking',

- Some of the sources were not peer-reviewed but instead were written articles sources previously written, by specific people (look to the neutrality point above)

- In the 'EGS Application' paragraph, the first sentence says 'According to Latimer ...' and proceeds to have a claim by him following after, but there is no source to this claim so I am not sure if its valid or not.

- The beginning of the article mentions Tim Latimer- the co-founder of Fevro Energy, and says that he worked as a drilling engineer at BHP until 2015 with a source to his Linkedin profile. The issue is that not everyone could know this was necessarily true (it is not an important bit of information but for clarity and sources sake) because those who do not have a Linkedin profile can see that he did work there (website blocks information for non users).

- The 'Drilling Demonstrations' paragraph at the end has claims about what Fervo Energy has done with their geothermal plants, and other information, yet there are no sources that back up these segments of information.

Suggestions For Improvement:

Reading over the article draft, there were a few things to note that I thought were open to suggestions:

- Some spelling/grammar mistakes throughout that could be improved

- In the 'Lead' paragraph, energy is misspelled as energry

- In the 'Comparable Plants' paragraph, geothermal is misspelled as goethermal

- In 'Background Idea' paragraph, instead of saying 'its fastest growth ever', maybe saying "the most growth it has seen in all of its history" might sound slightly better

- In 'Background Idea' paragraph when talking about what hydraulic fracturing, instead of saying 'Put simply', it may be better to say 'This is where horizontal wells are drilled stacked one upon one another...'

- More commas could be added to make the structure of some paragraphs flow a bit better when reading

- Some sentences in the article are not necessarily correct > for example in the 'Lead' paragraph, you said that Alphebet was formerly known as Google, however it is not that they were formerly known as Google, but instead acquired Google and became their parent company (this was googled by me because it seemed a little off when I first read it).

- I think a key suggestion for improvements should be to add more sources for some of the claims regarding the company and what they have done/what they have been involved with. There is a lot of information that doesn't have a clear source associated with it which could be improved.

- There is a lot of information regarding the company Fervo Energy and what they have done which is good (especially considering the article is on them)- which is helpfully for understanding what the company is and the type of things they have been involved in.

- Having the information on the co-founder Tim Latimer, and his background is helpful (in a smaller context) to understand how his background reflects the company he was a apart of.