User:Idiotchalk/sandbox/Fightstar GA1

GA Review
[note].
 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * [note]
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * [note]
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:

Issues in the article

 * Infobox
 * The main image should only have a maximum width of 250px.


 * Lead
 * "Fightstar are" > "Fightstar is".
 * "Their lineup comprises" > "Its lineup comprises of" or "The band's lineup comprises of".
 * All instances of "their" should be changed to "its", "the band's" or "Fightstar's".
 * Address
 * The lead becomes too general and focuses on positive critical praise for the band's albums.
 * "Indeed, debut album Grand Unification (2006)" is unencylopedic wording and PEA. The indeed should be removed and the sentence should read "Fightstar's debut album, Grand Unification (2006), [...]."
 * "Scottish publication [...] 'ultimate rock debuts" seems unneccesary for the lead. The quote is also not in the source.
 * "'Best British Newcomer' and 'Best British Band'" both accolades should be in quotations, not apostrophes.
 * Only "Best British Band" accolade is mentioned in the source.
 * "... rarities titled, Alternate Endings (2008) was released." Apostrophe should be moved before "titled" and a second apostrophe after the year.
 * "The four-piece" should be changed to either "Fightstar" or "the band."
 * "which heavily featured orchestral and choral elements" needs a reference.
 * Ref #1 can be moved to the end of "The band announced an extended hiatus in 2010,".


 * History
 * Use en dashes (–) instead of em dashes (—) for sub-section headings.


 * Origins (2003—2004)
 * "During 2003" > "In 2003"
 * "He was by this stage becoming increasingly frustrated..." reads like journalism, should be reworded.
 * No need to link "diploma", "college" and "university".
 * "amplified when Fightstar announced", "amplified" could use another less ambigious term.
 * "Simpson announced to the pop trio", "pop trio" > "Busted"
 * "The next day, the 14th,", "the 14th" isn't neccessary.


 * Members
 * Is there a need for the "Official members" title?
 * The en dash (–) should be used instead of the em dash (—).
 * Years active (e.g. (2003–2010) ) would be useful.


 * Awards
 * Section title should read "Awards and nominations".
 * The use of  and   tags would be useful, but it is not neccessary. See MOS:DTT.
 * can be used for Kerrang! Awards.
 * Should be placed after Discography.
 * Both nominations need references.


 * Discography
 * Per WP:LOW and WP:WPMAG, the discography section should only include a list of works and the year of release.


 * References
 * Ref #1: links to page 2 of the article where the hiatus is mentioned, it should link to page 1.
 * Ref #2: Rate Your Music is not a reliable source.
 * Ref #4 and #5 are dead links.
 * Ref #8 does not include the quote in the article.
 * Ref #12 redirects to the Huffington Post.
 * Ref #14 is broken and redirects to the site's index page.
 * Ref #18 does not work.