User:Iisabellasanch/Environmental issues in the Philippines/Leamanda Peer Review

Under "Climate change"

"
 * "Among other environmental impacts, climate change in the Philippines is having serious impacts, such has led to..."
 * This addition may be unnecessary, especially in the grand scheme of the article. The article title is "Environmental issues in the Philippines," so I think this addition is a bit wordy
 * "Most notorious of these typhoons occurred in the Cebu region of the Philippines in December of 2021. Known colloquially as Typhoon Odette, Typhoon Odette caused billions of dollars in infrasturcture and agricultural damages and displaced millions of people- destroying their homes and leaving them without adequate food or water supplies. The consequences of Typhoon Odette not only illustrate climate injustice in the Philippines, but also illustrate how government responses to these natural disasters directly influence the severity of them.


 * I hesitate to say "most notorious" but also I haven't done research on this topic so I don't know if it is the most well known one.
 * Maybe put a subheading under climate change to discuss this typhoon because it is a bit too specific for this section (example below)
 * 5 Climate Change
 * 5.1 "Typhoon" or "Typhoon Odette"
 * Check spelling
 * If you say "illustrate how government responses... influence the severity," I think you should try to include more supportive information of this. How is it illustrating that?


 * "Aside from geography, climate change impacts previously colonized and currently colonized regions the most"
 * This sentence is a little strange, I don't understand what it is saying and the "aside" contrasts with "the most"
 * "Since low-income countries have a history of colonialism and resource exploitation, their environment lacks the diversity necessary to prevail against natural disasters"
 * Although history of colonialism and resource exploitation is true and well known, you may want to find an article that can support this statement and cite it directly after this sentence
 * "A lack of biodiversity, in other words, reduces the resilience of a specific region- leaving them more susceptible to natural disasters and the effects of climate change."
 * I don't believe encyclopedic writing uses interrupters like "in other words". The sentence may be stronger if you remove it.
 * "With its history of Spanish colonization, the Philippines, thus, is not environmentally or economically equipped to tackle and overcome natural disasters or climate change."
 * What history of Spanish colonization? It was not mentioned earlier in this paragraph so talk about this more or include a citation/ link to another wikipedia page that provides more information on this.

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Iisaebellasanch


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Iisabellasanch/Environmental_issues_in_the_Philippines?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Environmental issues in the Philippines
 * Environmental issues in the Philippines

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)