User:InnocentSplit/Joseph Konde-Lule/Hardick.2 Peer Review

Peer review
This is where you will complete your peer review exercise. Please use the following template to fill out your review.

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing? InnocentSplit
 * Link to draft you're reviewing: User:InnocentSplit/Joseph Konde-Lule

Lead evaluation
This lead is extremely concise and well written. The only idea I might have about adding to your header is minor-- if you come across Konde-Lule's date and place of birth, you could add it there.

Content evaluation
You're probably already aware of the gaps your article has, and I assume it comes down to sources. But I think, if possible, adding Konde-Lule's place and day of birth and the research he did post-1980s and 1990s would be good. I see that Konde-Lule won some fellowships in 1990. What did he do with them? What research did that enable?

Tone and balance evaluation
The tone of this article is very appropriate for a Wikipedia article. The only question I have is about the introduction to the Rakai section, which begins to feel a lot more didactic than the rest of the article, if that makes sense. Linking to the concept of prevalence might solve that, as I mention at the bottom of this review.

Sources and references evaluation
Your reference links work and demonstrate a wide variety of sources. You have Iliffe's book cited twice, which I think can be fixed to have a 1 a, b citation style if you reuse the same source when adding a new citation. You might also think of adding more overviews of AIDS in Uganda, such as Iliffe The African AIDS Epidemic, which cites some of Konde-Lule's work in the notes and could be helpful in drawing conclusions about the country and continent-wide implications of his research.

Organization evaluation
At the beginning of the Rakai section you write, "It is generally accepted that the decline of HIV prevalence in Uganda was largely due to efforts focused on changing behavior; HIV is a virus currently without a cure. Therefore, for prevalence to decline, populations of infected individuals must decline as well." I think it would be best to start with a stronger lead for the section. You could state, first and foremost, what Rakai has to do with Konde-Lule but moving the second paragraph up/ moving around the information you already have. As it stands, the Rakai section feels like it comes out of nowhere, even though it is clearly an important component of his work. Your Background section flows very well, and with a few tweaks so will the Rakai one. Finally, maybe you could add some sort of concluding section. What did Joseph Konde-Lule do after the Rakai research? Maybe you could move some of the accolades you mention in the background section down in order to give the article more of a chronological flow.

Images and media evaluation
Could you add a better picture of Rakai, such as one that locates Rakai within Uganda? I think from the Wikipedia Commons is pretty good!

New Article Evaluation
I think that it is harder to follow the exact patterns of other biographical Wikipedia pages with more limited information, but you've done a super job so far. I think that the External Links section that you've added bolsters the notability of the subject quite well, and is a welcome addition to the page. My one suggestion is to add more links to other Wikipedia pages. You don't have very many, and I think you could condense some of you discussion of HIV prevalence at the top of the Rakai section by linking to the prevalence page! As you add biographical data adding an infobox would be useful.

Overall impressions
Overall an amazing start and great draft. I think that it will only get better, because you have an extremely solid chunk of information down on the page. Your tone and writing is very clear, and really stakes a claim for the "notability" of Konde-Lule!